Monday, 22 May 2017

WWE Backlash 2017

WWE Backlash 2017

Live on Pay Per View from the Allstate Arena in Chicago's Rosemont, Illinois, on Sunday 21st May, WWE presented it's Backlash event, exclusive to the Smackdown brand. Backlash has now moved to an earlier slot from the near end of the year previous airing. With a cluster of NXT Indy darlings called up in the midst of WWE's lacking roster, deflated titles and alienation of most of its fans over the last three years, would WWE's NXT luv-in really exceed cheap expectations? 

With so many green and difficult workers, and Jinder Mahal's absurd title placement, WWE may have a lot more to answer for after the final bell rings tonight.

Let's find out how it went.

Shinsuke Nakamura Vs Dolph Ziggler

Fan luvvies rejoice. Some random, non-English flounder of high ignorance has debuted. Prancing around and already a goof on Smackdown, alongside WWE's music-crowd editing software to trick cheers into his non-reactions and Vince McMahon's natural concern's of his translatable persona, was not best forthcoming tonight.

His opponent is the jobber formerly known as Dolph Ziggler. (Remember him?)

Dragged down with lacking feuds and weak NXT call ups to an already minimally sized roster, Ziggler had to work with another Indy darling of Triple H's 'trick the fans to love me' hand me downs. Thrilling.

The acrobatics of this jumpy little rabbit in Shinsucker Fu*kamoron fades quickly. It's all been done before, is nothing new, constantly repetitive and tiring from a Japanese circuit old age performer who doesn't have the transferable qualities to stand tall in WWE. Another Cruiserweight ushered into hopes of a mid card role are not WWE's best defining feature for an already rocky future.

The action was tepid and empty with Dolph Ziggler working tirelessly with spots and daft interactions to make the WWE rookie Nakamoron seem interesting. It will take much more than that.

Missed opportunities with Naka's brawling and technical attempts to seem relevant were a wasted mess, alongside a failed entrance that showed 'moron as exactly that, a newbie NXT luvvie of Triple H's ignorant who won a lottery than talented call up. Nakamora is way out of his depth already and proves yet another failed experiment of the NXT rabble dwindling WWE's product further on Triple H's insane and unlistening ego and ultimately underwhelming.

Shinfu*ker Nakamoron got no charisma, jobber, debut and not translatable as NXT marks scream of. Triple H biggest mark of all.

As predicted Shinsake Nakamura won. Thanks for coming Ziggler.

WWE Smackdown Tag Team Championship
The Uso's (c) Vs Breezango

The Fashion Police, with a complete rip of of Law and Order (WWE's finest ideas are everyone else's) Fandango and Tyler Breeze have gathered interest over recent week's that WWE failed to notice and care for years. Now in a tight spot with more failed tag teams at an all time low, lacking any detail and simply boring, this spread was finally put on. It looked like another simply Smackdown episode.

WWE had its own level of contempt and just put it on for the sake of it. It would not have surprised if the company switched the titles to Breezango to dump them the following Tuesday to the Singh Brothers.

The Uso's continue to be good workers who are always short changed, lost in the shuffle and no one cares about. They are decent workers, but why should anyone care? They are just there, and they are boring to many, thanks to WWE's once more misguided lack of direction.

The action was 'funny' for some and sheer lunacy for everyone else. Tyler Breeze was the focus of the match, dressed in as a Janitor, with a condom on his head. After which he was stripped to reveal a Grandmother's outfit and dress. Thrilling. The Uso's ripped it off and smoothly flung it out of the ring, which unintentionally caressed the side of JBL's face at ringside. Now that was smooth. Good range.

Breeze was stripped of his clothes and moved into another attire. Eventually he was down to his original quick change gimmick after two layers removed. Some fans felt this was a talent something that many on the roster could not provide, including the likes of Finn Balor, who cannot develop from face paint/generic leather vanilla dude like Breeze with three attires and 'entertain' if that's what it is called. Okay, we'll give him that, he does a lot more than others, but in the grand scheme of it all, WWE are only there to mock and play jokes. Go figure.

The only highlight of this battle was seeing Fandango's delightful pelvic gyrations. With a strong chance to win and the drop the gold to the Singh Brothers on the following Smackdown, WWE decided not to have the Fashionista's lead on. 

The Uso's won after a random and forgettable finish that makes them look as much an afterthought as Breeze's daft costume change. It would also have been a perfect time for Fandango to turn on Breeze and go to the mid card. These two are WWE's resident, mocking crew. So much has changed.

JBL, also highly accused of Bullying in WWE and of Mauro Ranallo, a manic depressive, 'forced' to leave WWE, uttered another disgraced comment live on air. JBL - "(Fabulous) Moolah has come back from the dead!" Is there no shame or respect from WWE and Vince? Have some class. 

Baron Corbin Vs Sami Zayn

Another empty match that is meant to favour Corbin. WWE are said to be high on making him their next main event competitor. HaHaHa. That's funny. A random who never materialised for three years since the main roster call up, has always been lurking in the shadows, on pre-shows or missing PPV's entirely and pain staking repetitive feuds with Dolph Ziggler that drove many away.

Tonight, WWE bumped its next world prospect to another jobbers filler match, so veteran jobber and steroid junkie Jinder Mahal could raise WWE's Indian marketing program as main event challenger.

His opponent was Sami 'the mark' 'thanks for coming' Zayn. Is there actually any point to Sami Zayn at all? Give him his pink slip already.

This one was absolutely hilarious. The supposed, new chosen one, Barry Corbin was once more weak, tired and empty of any depth. Three years floundering and this was his strength. WWE are really at a loss on every option now, huh? 

To make matters more hilarious, after all the useless and dreadful mat scrambling by both, and exposing Corbin's lacklustre repertoire, Sami Zayn won with a cheap victory that made even less sense than this booking matchup. Whatever. It was garbage.

Tag Team
Six Man
Charlotte Flair, Naomi (c) and Becky Lynch Vs Natalya, Tamina and Carmella w/ James Ellsworth

Christ what a boring rabble. Some of WWE's strongest females, and the weakling's WWE favours personally, could not be more back to the blueprint of classic diva throwaway matches.

The Women's revolution lasted long. WWE still try to throw that horse to market. It bolted many moons ago.

Apparently this is a "six WOMAN" tag match. Oh grow up. The team led by Natalya are no known as "The Welcoming Committee." What lunacy. Oh, by the way, You're Welcome. How original.

Becky Lynch made a statement early on with an absurd mohawk resembling a red haired cockatoo meets mad lesbian look. That was all she had to offer.

Smackdown Women's champion Naomi was allowed to lose as part of a team in a tag match that needs to set up future options. However WWE absurdly continued to protect the clumsy mess that is Charlotte Flair and have champ Naomi take most of the beatings from the enemy.

With nothing set up for future challenges, repetitive Natalya/Charlotte, Natalya/Becky interactions, WWE have skim nothing short of embarrassment. The diva's division is officially back, with some of its most powerful women on the roster. Classic WWE.

The powerhouse beast babe in Tamina was always a highlight that WWE failed to move on years ago. Against Naomi, it would be the perfect time to enhance the pair's friends come foes. Carmella, who has strong options as we previously notes six months ago, is floundering. Meek transitions, jabs and pathetic opponents exposing her more with the same tepid jabs from Charlotte and co has once more vastly evaporated the clear waters to murky sewage again.

James Ellsworth continues to be WWE's leading performer on Smackdown, always coming into his own in every role, which WWE are too chicken to move into a serious position from last year's hype of WWE title opportunities. WWE are all out of options on everyone and its own amusement mockery angles on fans and performers. NXT has failed.

Becky Lynch tapped out to a very pitiful Sharpshooter by Natalya, so her, Tamina and Carmella pick up a cheap win that means nothing in balancing the numbers of card honour/dishonour outcomes.

WWE United States Championship
Kevin Owens (c) Vs AJ Styles

The Sleeper Match, Good Ol' Owens.
WWE has always been in a tight spot with its dumbed down roster and weak stars left on it given favouritism and spots by default. Triple H's grand vision of NXT has failed on EVERY single delivery, and there has been many since three years ago.

The current experiment of bulbous, useless, charisma zapping Indy darling Kevin Owens, given numbers of titles by favouritism instead of talent and dropping ratings as his main priority makes a continued laughing stock of WWE, who don't seem to know it or simply don't care. We believe its the latter.

His opponent is acrobatic Action Man from TNA, AJ Styles, who has been nothing short of material, move set, title worth and championship material. He's only there by default. WWE's failure to create any main stars and influx of Triple H's obsessed Indy darlings in hopes to gather a small flock of fans has failed categorically. Stock down, ratings down and pitiful production values from WWE on all brands, also at their lowest ever ratings since the dawn of time, rally needs to light a firecracker up WWE's sagging backside.

Wake us when it's interesting.
It was the same age old routine. Kevin Owens' few moves, brawl, scream, roll around in and outside, act hardcore or whatever and take breather spots in less than three minutes of match time was standard booking lunacy continuing. Big Kev's very first move was walking into moves, yelling and in headlocks, taking breather spots with AJ. Outside spots naturally followed next. ZZzzzzzzzzz. This ain't the Indies, dipsh*t!

His opponent is the acrobat who jumps all over for a bit of fun, AJ Styles. The real life Action figurine knows his place. To be the performing monkey always on the outside looking in, trying to get a handful of luvvies to cheer on cheap pops of no actually entertaining poise.

With a minority audience behind the pair of them and a 200 fan strong following from NXT hopefuls desperate not to have their illusion of failings broken, will take blind sides on action for sympathy. Though WWE, who had the catastrophic brainwave of putting this on last, with two non-WWE workers, failing to encourage a new and old audience, has proven a failed project.

AJ did more flippy sh*t on the in and outside, until Kevin Owens did the outside beatdown *Yawn* until AJ Styles was counted out in another pathetic result to protect Kevin Owens, Triple H's pet poodle, who has dropped all ratings over the last two years, with favouritist titles, devalued production and no actual talent. Wonderful.

It was a weak and sad 'add-on' everywhere action spot building mess that was not any level a 'match'.

Luke Harper Vs Erick Rowan

Why is this match on? Toilet break. Filler. Stop gap. No other options. No care given. Predictable. Messy. Waste of time. Goodbye. 

Luke Harper won. No-on could even make out which of them was bad and good. What a fail on WWE's part yet again in its pathetic booking committee. Get some actual talent instead of Triple H's fawning bulls*it statements of his own ego. He cant.

WWE Championship
Randy Orton (c) Vs Jinder Mahal w/ The Singh Brothers

Random jobber, Jinder Mahal, fresh from the switch of brand shakeup to Smackdown, was gifted a favoured six pack contenders challenge to qualify for tonight's title opportunity. A random jobber who never made it big, was fired, had and is continuing to violate WWE's wellness policy with the use of steroid enhancing drugs, with Vince McMahon's backing.

Used for WWE's current Indian expansion, a nation with reports of constant rapists, shanty towns and inequality, WWE enforced a drug abuser jobber in hopes to encourage Indians to flock to the show. How classy of WWE's enhancement tactics. 

Rejoice! The Singh Brothers, nee Bollywood Boyz, have names. Traditional ones, of course as Sunil and Samir.

Randy Orton, WWE's only true, consistent and excellent worker, had to work a one man show with the disastrous calamity that was Mahal and his new tag team friends the former Bollywood Boyz, now called The Singh Brothers. How original. 

The match was only held strong once again by WWE's only star act Randy Orton. Fans were somewhat anti-Orton for one reason. Not for disliking Orton, but disliking WWE's way of booking the same type of John Cena, lead star approach, that fuels hatred. This will affect everyperformer who is cast in such a role. Orton also recieved many cheers once beating down Jinder Mahal and his companions at ringside later.

The big moment was when Orton, blocked by the barricade of Jinder's buddy's, saw Orton literally flip and beat down the pair with ringside announce table flinging. One Singh was flipped so high and took the bump incorrectly, which could have broke his neck. Orton laughed, and rightly so for such another green rookie with zero charisma.

No joke, Jinder 'druggie' Mahal
is WWE Champion.
Randy Orton would later attempt the double DDT, rope-drop down slam on the pair, as Jinder Mahal moved around to the back and slid in to catch Randy Orton with a quick and useless finishing move that was standard action to win the WWE Championship in a shock moment that fans found laughably inconceivable.

Fans can and could not believe the finisher, add-ons and weak action by jobber Mahal, who has jobbed to everyone in weeks, months and years, to instantly gain a lottery win come title victory.

In hindsight it become obvious that Vince McMahon chose this option to capitalise on his Indian market expansion of WWE, which will be a categorical failure. Jinder Mahal, its first Indian WWE Champion, in storyline basis only, is a mess. Jinder Mahal is actually Canadian and not Indian at all, meaning The Great Khali is still its only champion. WWE hope Indian fans are easily stupid to believe such blatant trickery.

PPV Rating - 1/10

Men/Women of their matches - Dolph Ziggler, Fandango, Baron Corbin, Naomi, Randy Orton, Luke Harper, Neither good enough

Man/Woman of the PPV - Jinder Mahal


Big ears, Cabbage Patch Doll, Tye Dillinger, who has got nothing going for him and some lame "Perfect 10" gimmick which means nothing at all, beat Aidan English. English, who has the talent, is often hated by WWE, despite being a hot performer, for some random from NXT who is overly green and needs WWE's sound editing machine to look good. Plus the shaved grooves in his hair are so 1997. Tye Dillinger was truly amazing. He couldn't even hit a knee buster with any connectivity on his crowning move. Another flash in pan with zero charisma that just stands and points. Thrilling.

Shinfu*ker Nakamoron, Kevin blubber Owens & jumping Monkey dolly AJ Styles were WWE's leading ladies tonight. WWE are really hoping on the Indie Mark Crowd in Chicago tonight.

The eyes, the nose, the fear, the roar, the veins.
The champ.
WWE's expansion into Indian markets is going to be more divisive for the nation than ever. Seen as a nation of scandals, scams, poverty, slave labour, sweatshops using kids and rapists galore treating Women as the most disrespected class in all the nation, WWE are playing with troubling fire PR wise. No press statement or storyline can protect it from such.

To further add to India's demise on WWE''s part, it's so called champion, Jinder Mahal, has been openly using steroids to enhance his performance and abuse and allowed to bypass the WWE's Wellness Policy program. Vince McMahon is back to his pill popping antics that almost destroyed the WWE in 1984. Many believe McMahon, accused of turning blind eyes and distributing the drugs to talent to make money off them, was favoured by judges at the hands of untold corrupt bribes.

Either way, WWE has lowered its product to an all time low. Fans will not tune in for Jinder 'the junkie' Mahal as its leading champion. The ratings have dropped to their lowest ever on Raw and Smackdown in the past two weeks and month overall. This is not going to encourage that any further. A random jobber who launched to the top in less than a month, using drugs and corruption to get there. A great message for the kids. WWE also have made Mahal resemble a terrorist in its writing, appearance and essence, which is another disgraced betrayal to its supposed nation of sacrificial lambs in the Armed Forces. What a way to respect such honour in instigating a Muhammad Hassan approach once more, which already failed previously, even on a day when Terrorist's around the world struck nations with attacks. Vince McMahon. Classy as ever. Or simply delusional every year failing to see what works. What investor or stockist is proud to support this nature? 2017 is in decline for wrestling and stock should be pulled instantly. It will only get worse for all attached to it. It's also highly disgusting, but Vince McMahon often uses the dead, or any other practise to shamefully try and gain a moment of buzz. Have some class, babe.

WWE's Champion is a Steroid abusing Junkie who represents India, a nation of rapists, slaves, shanty towns & scams.

The tale of the Fat Boy who
wanted to feel special.
The United States Championship is yet another worthless prize that no-one can truly respect or give a single care about, with the face of America an overweight interpretation that many believe all Americans are ugly, fat, rude, obnoxious fast food eaters that makes them hated instead of celebrated. Way to go. The Face of America, Kevin Fried Owens and his big bucket o' Chicken Wings. Wonderful.

Dolph Ziggler did what he could. Dolph is useless but so is the thing he is playing with every time in efforts to boost up the ever green NXT batch of newbie fools that will never materialise on such ignorance. NXT proves a failed experiment under Triple H's insanely self imposed ego. The man cannot separate himself from problems and find the solutions that will exceed his business acumen. Simply put, he doesn't have any. He's just famous for sticking one in the bosses daughter.

This still going?
Fandango's hip gyrations were the only interesting point in a complete useless throwaway match that could have been a good one. WWE always destroy than create. 

Luke Harper? Enough said. Who cares. Erick Rowan needs letting go.

Naomi used as rag doll to look as weakest champ yet? Only her entrance was mesmeric today. The rest was a fail on WWE's part again. The winners we're also an afterthought. Only Charlotte Flair was once again protected, which is destroying WWE's female division yet again. New brand, same old crap.

Should be repackaged
 as Barren Corbin
Baron Corbin. Err, what? Normally the likes of Corbin and Braun Strowman, three years on the roster and never achieving one thing, would be future endeavoured. WWE is at a low point of talent AND empty numbers to put on a show. Then it call's up or hires all the wrong one's full of ignorance that pull down the WWE's walls of credibility. It truly is laughable. 

Backlash perfectly exposes how screwed the WWE lockerroom and Smackdown's roster really is. All green filler matches. NXT/Indy darling fails. The crowd were highly indifferent and not happy with the current product and let WWE know. WWE will use being in 'CM Punk' land of Chicago as an excuse to play it down. Chicago is regarded as one of the most cultural and expressively creative cities in the United States. 

Did a perfect job, with a laugh. 
Randy Orton jobbed out to a jobber? That's funny. Normally many would be fuming but Orton, like the rest of us, can truly laugh. It means nothing and further weakens his naysayers cheering for some goof high on paraphernalia, scandals and jobbed out to all roster stars which no skillset or talent to showcase his title reign. WWE look an even bigger fool and will harm investments and ratings more than it realises. Scores have already cancelled their WWE Network subscriptions, plan to boycott Smackdown and possibly Raw and live shows. All for a few Indians, who are already watching and actually adore Randy Orton than Jinder Mahal. Score!

WWE is the most hilarious laughing stock and ruins itself without anyone else having to try. Failing to utilise or gain those that will make it work, and Triple H's obsessive need to prove more than the trophy husband with his NXT failure playground is embarrassing. EVERY, SINGLE, CALLUP, from NXT, HAS, BEEN, A, CATEGORICAL, FAIL. That's a fact. None has succeeded and those given freebie titles by Triple H luvvins add to it. WWE are in distress. It only has one performer of consistency that was hilarious dethroned for no sustainable reason. John Cena, in the wings, will not be around forever and has already driven most fans away.

McMahon still thinks he's in control, and yet he is not. His decisions are reflective of that. It also marks his level of contempt for fans who shower him with their cash to be rewarded with hate and sneer. You're better off throwing it down the toilet.

Me Me Me.
The NXT ignorance crew will not raise Triple H's grand plans of failed sad-acts to the top of WWE and with its cheap writers, lacking creative plans and producers missing crucial points, WWE is at an all time low, by its own actions. Sucks to be you. That's your problem though, not mine, isn't it? 

It's also a great way to demoralise the morale of the entire professionals in the locker-room that bust their butts for WWE to be rewarded with measly scraps and cutting reputation disinterest.

Triple H's NXT experiment and Vince McMahon appeasing his daughter's husband to feel a natural McMahon, bitter of other brainchild's supporting WWE for years, has failed. Get with it and lose the ego. EVERYONE in WWE on all brands is as green as they come. There is no talent shining at all. 

You're Welcome.

© Max Waltham 22nd May 2017
All Rights Reserved

Tuesday, 2 May 2017

WWE Payback 2017

WWE Payback 2017

Live on Pay Per View on Sunday, April 30th (Or May 1st UK time, as intended) Payback, exclusive to the Raw brand, took place at the SAP Center in San Jose, California.

Usually Payback is WWE's shockingly good event for a regular Pay Per View that delivers outside of its usual constraints. Last year it sunk to a new low. Would this year be able to pick back up or continue the downward spiral WWE so easily allow for themselves? 

With its Superstar Shakeup, titles all over the place, and failed story depth could it rise above? Featuring a title bound for its rival brand and two already moved superstars, WWE made a sheer mess of its brand exclusivity deal. With the House of Horrors premier and eleventh hour changes, was it doomed from the start?

Payback's a real one!

Let's find out.

WWE United States Championship
Kevin Owens (c) Vs Chris Jericho

Kevin Owens was labelled as "The face of America" a bulbous, laboured, pedestrian failure who whines, is handed everything and never materialises on his own talent. WWE just gave American's and its critics a perfect branding of its ordinary citizens.

The action swiftly began with laboured punches from Kevin Owens, who popped outside already and returned to lying on his back. The same routine of his worn out repertoire and bloated, blown up 'action' within less than three minutes. Something to be proud of. Huffing, puffin and all pedestrian favouritism from Triple H's NXT lunacy ignorance sees WWE decline even more ratings from its freebie trinkets devalued in hand gifting to another failed pet project. 

Even in a suit, with a shave and snorting his nostrils, Kevin Owens still looks like a cheap and tacky version of an angry lesbian finally making an effort to dress up for a night out to cover up his blotchy bits. There is no amount of airbrushing that can smooth over those cracks, darling.

Chris Jericho, on the other hand, couldn't deliver either. Old, dated, tired out and the pair phoning it in, with Jericho having to sell the failed run through of Big Kev was another puerile embarrassment. It was all filler and finally transferred the United States Championship to Chris Jericho after a boring opener that devalued the US title, America, the sport and WWE even more than ever. 

No-one truly cared.

As per stipulation from last month's failed Superstar Shakeup, mini draft, the winner would remain on Smackdown LIVE, thus moving Jericho. WWE badly advertised the US title for the PPV and now realise they needed to have it play out before moving to avoid is constant false advertising failings.

Jericho is leaving on Thursday once more to go touring after his third WWE return for a pay off only is over.

WWE Cruiserweight Championship
Neville (c) Vs Austin Aries

Boring acrobats, the ignorant weed of cast off action men dolls, Austin Aries had another random, favoured encounter with no earned plaudits. It was another typical jump around, swatting flies run through of pathetic lunacy proving the Cruiserweight's and its random title have no place in WWE and should never have been rectified. 

The failed action was an early toilet break which saw Austin Aries win by disqualification, so Neville could retain the worthless title and continued this disastrously worn out feud already. 

WWE are too scared to pull the natural plug.

Another of Triple H's excellent business management fails on ignorance. NXT and Cruiser's, Tag's and Women have all but sunk.

WWE Raw Tag Team Championship
Sheamus and Cesaro Vs The Hardy Boyz (c)

Some felt this picked up the pace, which wasn't difficult with the previous two filler match, warm up acts. 

Golden talent Cesaro, wasted outside of the main event, always brings the excellence that WWE seem to hate. Instead, we had the old age routine act of boredom that was the Hardy Boyz nostalgia of yesteryear failing to advance the future. 

An already injured Jeff Hardy, working limited action, was used to sell injury angles with turnbuckle action but failed to deliver. Hardy proved ring rust once more from his laboured TNA and Independent circuit run throughs taking a beautifully crisp leg drop of high rise Cesaro. Jeff Hardy was later smashed by ever useless liability Sheamus with an injury. Hardy suffered a cracked tooth, after moving the wrong way on Cesaro's dismount.

Cesaro also officially turned against the lovey Hardyz, with already bad boy Sheamus. There was no other option in WWE's mind. Which could have broke him free and finally boosted him into the lacking main event. Vince doesn't like him, so there. The Hardy Boyz retained.

WWE Raw Women's Championship
Bayley (c) Vs Alexa Bliss

Ever lacking champion and hometown hero Bayley walked into the arena with a distant reaction, despite home love. She still wasn't over and WWE's poor management of her as a plus one random to Banks/Charlotte months back continues to see her zombified run of just being there. 

Her competition was a freshly transferred Alexa Bliss, which was obvious in competition and result. The match was somewhat off and distilled 'wrestling by the numbers' comfortability, but provided some interest in places and was better than most at this point of the card.

It was fresh but tepid. Eventually Alexa Bliss naturally defeated predictable favourite Bayley to become the new Raw Women's champion. WWE continued to overhype her as 'making history' from winning both SD Live and Raw Women's titles. The titles have only existed for a year and aren't that historic or competitive at all. Fans are not that easily retarded.

House of Horrors
Randy Orton Vs Bray Wyatt

Well, here it is. The match we've all been waiting for. WWE once again failed to address its false advertising. Previously for the WWE title, since the Shakeup switch, Wyatt, now a Raw superstar with Randy Orton on Smackdown was simply a regular match now, losing all its hype.

Fully advertised as a WWE title match, WWE decided not to put it on the line in another bungled false advertising con.

How did you know they were doing a pre-taped segment in some random house? WWE recorded the first part of its 'match' which breaks false advertising yet again.

The match was instantly laughable with Orton pulling up to a derelict house in a limousine, shirtless, but in sweatpants. 

He entered this spooky house that was daft and laced with almost everything that resembled a random anything falls, hardcore, anything goes, backstage brawl.

It was simply sad and made Bray Wyatt as a weird entity fans could support, simply removed from main event status due to Vince McMahon's warped ideas of madness conferred onto Wyatt.

Orton, on the other hand looked insanely ridiculous in playing this competitor filled with suspended dolls from ceilings, run-down, broken walls in need of restoration, and battles in the kitchen, supposedly to be Bray's.

Jokes of cooking, kitchen sinks and washing the dishes were aplenty from fans and critics who could not fathom the ridiculousness of it all.

It's the Kitchen Sink!
Do you dishes, dear.
The scenes ended, from the darkened night sky with Bray Wyatt smashing a refrigerator over Randy Orton, before hijacking his limousine and arriving to the Payback arena, which was brimming with light evening, cloudy sky that made fans in attendance applaud with laughter.

Even WWE could not think about making it a parallel dimension. They have no ideas without yours truly, Max Waltham, and try to emulate a wackier version of WWE mimicry in Bray Wyatt's empty shell. you aint me. It cannot be replicated in any capacity. 

Samoa Joe Vs Seth Rollins

Whilst waiting for Bray Wyatt to arrive, the match was stalled. Fans were as confused as everyone except Vince McMahon's even more warped brain of lunacy, it would seem. Babe, this was not engaging or appealing and darn confusing to many. You and I might understand but your audience does not, and now, you look more senile than ever. That's advice, bae.

The next filler match began with another of Triple H's ignorant friends and resident boring chubster Samoa Joe, fresh from TNA cast offs. (It's still TNA, not iMPACT Wrestling). In his constantly boring and evaporated 'feud' with Seth Rollins, both based on triple H's over inflated ego (even when off TV, he has to be centre of attention with other pawns) this was mundanely boring.

Rollins, who cannot seem to sell injuries any longer and has been over done to the point of extinction, had no other option but to try. Working with the clunky, Yeti come Sumoa Joe, the match was infeasible, daft and weak.

Poor brawls, lacking leg work over's and pedestrian filler from Samoa 'non entity' Joe, who simply stumbles around, pouts his snorty nose and looks every bit Kevin Owens' twin brother of failed succession, was unappealing trash.

Seth Rollins eventually countered a random move of no value to win another toilet fest break.

House of Horrors, Part 2
Randy Orton Vs Bray Wyatt

Bore Wyatt returned to the arena, fresh from the limo and entered normally, after its pre-taped lunacy.

Once the lights in the arena returned to normal, Randy Orton was shockingly behind Bray Wyatt in a mysterious turn of events. It was unexplained, of course.

As Randy Orton beat down Bray Wyatt, as predicted to the trained eye, fans were short-changed when newest Smackdown star Jinder 'full of steroids' Mahal ran in with his new friends The Singh Brothers, to ambush Randy Orton. Mahal, who had been given a contenders battle at the next PPV for Smackdown, Backlash, walked off with the WWE title. 

Jacked 'n' Juicy Jinder's before and afters.

Bray Wyatt seized the opportunity and used Sister Abigail on Randy Orton to cover him in the ring to win this appalling House of Horrors match.

A week prior, WWE gave Jinder Mahal a title opportunity because WWE are using him and the Singh's to gain some network attention in the newly set up India TV deal. Displaying Indians as cheating, steroid junkies, un-apprehended by WWE's blind eye Wellness Policy system and flaunting disgrace is not something to be proud of. Plus Jinder Mahal always has and forever will be a jobber for life.
Ratings have once more since declined since Owens, Joe and Mahal at the top of WWE. Excellent moves Vince.

There WAS/IS SOOOO much content that could have made this exceptional. Once again I do have all the answers, but Vince is distant and selfish to be the showoff. I don't care for all that, but without me it is fundamental proof it cannot be anything exceptional. So many things were missed here that could have been epic and barely scratched the surface. If only Vince McMahon would think about his product's future than hate fest snarl.

Oh well. I guess that's your problem right now, not mine.

Roman Reigns Vs Braun Strowman

The final main event couldn't come quick enough. It felt too long as a PPV and at this point fans just wanted it over with.
WWE hoped to use Braun 'Brown' Strowman as bait to anti-Roman Reigns fans, after WWE's John Cena Mark II, thrown down everyone's throats to willingly accept come disinterest gain traction.

Braun Strowman, who has been on the main roster for two years and still never once over, was only cheered for the sheer hate of Roman Reigns, and WWE know it. Outside of Reigns, Strowman is yet another failed concept that would normally have been future endeavoured by now.

Week's before this match, Braun Strowman tipped over an Ambulance where Roman Reigns was inside. Pre-recorded footage showed Reigns being unbuckled and escape by his shadow as Braun tipped it over. There was a mechanical crane on the other side that actually tipped the vehicle which was another poorly delivered heat builder. 

Strowman continued the no sell but clumsily walking around, doing nothing.

So comes Payback, where Strowman used the 'big man' moves including the Chokeslam, with another useless deliverance that had no impact to character building. He did it onto the announce table, as is the repetitive case every PPV.
Reigns followed with a Spear and failed near fall. He landed two Superman Punches, who countered with a lame submission. Braun used Running Powerslam's to gain an advantage which helped to get ahead. He cheaply covered him as Braun Strowman defeated hated WWE favourite Roman Reigns, which had absolutely no value or impact for either of them.

Fans were only hoping it would raise Strowman with fans. It didn't. They cheer for Roman, so vehement despised, under Vince and WWE's failed direction of the last two years which had a top performer apparent. It was supposed to be an Ambulance match tonight, but WWE changed it at the eleventh hour, as always, which once more, puts off fans and viewers with such mismanaged indecision.

This was clearly a failed main event of both stars and signals a serious concern for WWE's future.

WWE is fresh out of options, and has no-one left to implement success. 

You're Welcome!

PPV Rating - 1/10

Men/Women of their matches - Chris Jericho, Neville, Cesaro, Alexa Bliss, Randy Orton, Seth Rollins, Roman Reigns

Man/Woman of the PPV - Bray Wyatt

Fine specimens failing to
launch by WWE alone.
Packing more than a punch, too.
Cesaro was once more the star of the show, forever wasted in the tag divisions. WWE has since lost numerous performers in the tag decision by injury, release or break ups. Once more Triple H's failed tag division has crumbled and replacements with cheap ignorance infesting all the waters of NXT has/is proving disastrous. A serious cleanse and re-configuration is needed. Old hat performers including the opportunities Hardy sad acts are not what once was and WWE still fails to learn it cannot keep relying on its old age to create the new one. Cesaro was the only selling point and this would have been the perfect time to move him from Sheamus and go solo to the main event, but Vince McMahon seemingly hates him for some unexplained reason, yet, with Rusev, Orton and what was once Wyatt, where/are the most over guys in WWE.

Neville was the better of the two and is the King of Cruiserweight's he so claims, but only by default. there is no competition and as we have constantly explained the Cruiserweight's have no place in WWE and should be disbanded. The title is ugly, useless and holds no value. It is a hindrance than a success, just like the cursed Intercontinental championship.

WWE's old hat merry go round with its ignorance favoured dilution of title, prestige and competition proves both the Jericho/Owens types are a constant failure for WWE. No direction, apathy, inable knowledge knowing how to work from green, out of shape stars who do not strike any relevance continue to dwindle fans and ratings. Jericho, who is leaving soon after his useless win, and zero competition, has added nothing of importance to WWE on another failed snatch and grab paycheck return.

Alexa Bliss has made history holding both of the same title. The Women's title, which was never properly disbanded, actually nullifies her legitimate history claim as it is only the Raw Women's title which was the original title, unseperated. WWE have no clue what to do anymore in its own branding. Bliss, even with this phantom run, has only held the titles that are practically just as new as her. It is not something to be overhyping instantly, but WWE can't help themselves. These decisions further alienate its audience. They never learn or listen. The results are telling.

What to say about that House of Horrors one off? Much and little comes to mind. Laughable, pathetic, comedy, lunacy and missed opportunities on action, character builds and credible epic match making. WWE have no clue and get bored. When they do they fail to put the full effect in. When they do, however, it is distorted to an illogical way of interaction. Thus, WWE have failed both brands, fans, performers, titles and everything in between. It was an epic fail. Orton was a chump. Wyatt was a fool. Nothing was set up further for any involved and delivered further contempt alongside a disastrous, cheap and tacky ending of no sense. Snakes. worms, bugs, The Boogeyman, Mirror trickery and distorted images could even have proved profitable for some fun and entertaining weirdness. Instead WWE, clueless and having no creative direction in their offices, settled for a movie style filmed disappointment instead. Bray Wyatt can never get over on his own or when a distraction arrives.

Seth Rollins has reached the point of sheer boredom. Triple H's ego has destroyed WWE's second best performer in the Wrestling Wonders Pro 50 2016, and former number 1 previously. Injury prone, Triple H's extra, alongside his poodle Samoa Joe, and a random encounter that has no being, WWE enter another sloppy seconds. Who really cares? This is deadpan. Another replay of the failure that was Dolph Ziggler and Baron Corbin's painstakingly lukewarm 'feud' last year.

Roman Reigns was the better worker of the two on the night, but the moment Roman Reigns works a decent match, the problems have already been cast. He is the most reviled superstar on WWE's roster due to its failed mismanagement runs two years back as champion. Since then, forcing a John Cena style acceptance whether you like it or not, from Vince McMahon's dominance, has shifted the haters to the edge of never. Reigns is ruined and nothing can seemingly be done under WWE's current direction to fix it. Of course, I know, but WWE enjoy burning bridges, so. As for Strowman, he is more greener, or browner, than ever before. He is just a jobber that fits in place right now, but has nothing to offer and should have been pink slipped years ago. Being cheered as the anti-hero is not going to get him over through cheap tactics. 

© Max Waltham 02nd May 2017
All Rights Reserved