WWE Hell in a Cell 2016
WWE chose to open its hellish doors once more into its wresting asylum. Featuring a whopping three Cell's instead of the traditional main event one, and with so many lacklustre performers on the exclusively Raw dominated roster, it was bound for failure.
Coming live on Pay Per View, on Sunday 30th October from the TD Garden in Boston, Massachusetts, WWE attempted to change perceptions and cover lacklustre champions with a steel shield. Would it really be enough?
Let's find out...
United States Championship
Hell in a Cell
Rusev w/ Lana Vs Roman Reigns (c)
Opening the Pay Per View was the United States Championship duel between Roman Reigns (c) Vs Rusev w/ Lana.
This was also inside a Hell in a Cell structure which saw Rusev dominate and manages once more to push and bring out the best in Roman Reigns but fans are still risk averse to Reigns and his poor management to stardom by WWE.
Nearly over twenty minutes Rusev and Roman Reigns really put on a charismatic spectacle with rough and tumble thrills that opened and contained the show for a perfect start as it should be. Reigns retained.
Bayley Vs Dana Brooke
The two random floaters from the NXT division on the main show could not be more deflated. Like Bayley's entrance streamers, it was a poor showing despite the girls best attempts to stand out and make interesting. It isn't their fault but WWE have not got any ideas for them. It was another filler waste of time and Dana Brooke's sloppy interactions with Bayley's overdone hype that isn't materialising as it should is yet another downer for WWE and all its fans. Bayley won.
Tag Team
Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson Vs Enzo Amore and Big Cass
Already bored of SpongeBob toting pineapple head and Joey Tribbiani wannabe Enzo Amore and his towering mannequin, fans were once more burntout by the next in show. To combat this repetitive match from months upon months with no logical structure or basis, was some random team from New Japan as WWE likes to overhype by Triple H's overinflated erection. The pair just like their opponents have been a complete washout, boring and don't fit in WWE. Though Triple H was obsessed with one or two Japanese matches of them and thought he knew what was "Best for Business" as usual with his inherently abusive ego.
The ignorance of Karl Anderson and his chicken leg botch jobs alongside the clumsy Cass and useless Amore leaves Luke Gallows permanently trapped in a tight corner. Once playing a retarded Festus, this time when Gallows has options, he is saddled with flagging donkeys. He needs to go solo and Karl Anderson needs releasing imminently.
The match was dire, tiresome, repetitive and pathetic. There was no need for them to be out there. All filler no thriller. Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson won.
WWE Universal Championship
Hell in a Cell
Kevin Owens (c) Vs Seth Rollins
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| The "champion" is this. |
The most useless "champion" that WWE didn't really want in sadsack lethargy Kevin Owens was another throwaway moment that could not go anywhere despite the brilliance of hard working trier Seth Rollins.
Gearing for a Wrestlemania match with Rollins, Triple H, who has been obsessed with bloated and outdated 'star' Owens is once again playing games to angle his own Wrestlemania moment. The man can never put his ego aside.
Gearing for a Wrestlemania match with Rollins, Triple H, who has been obsessed with bloated and outdated 'star' Owens is once again playing games to angle his own Wrestlemania moment. The man can never put his ego aside.
Owens, who once again rolled around on the floor, failed to do anything, hollered and waited for Rollins to walk into his pedestrian manoeuvres saw an abysmal cage battle that had absolutely no merit whatsoever. Tripe H thinks Owens is great and has given him every title as a freebie fan club association. How sad.
Once again mid life crisis loser Chris Jericho ran in to help his idle friend Owens get one over on Rollins. Not repetitive at all. How entertaining. How obvious. How pathetic.
While Rollins did all he could it was against him from the star with such a poor and tacky worker who lazes around and needs to feel special.
Of course, Kevin Owens won. Another non victory with a championship that isn't even heavyweight standards. Plus it is as ugly as Owens himself. Fans left, have left and continue to leave because of this high ignorance. The title, its bearer's and its lack of direction continue to make a mockery of everything WWE hope to achieve which is currently unknown. Like Owens, it simply plods along.
WWE Cruiserweight Championship
TJ Perkins (c) Vs Brain Kendrick
Another chance opportunity for Triple H's erectile fandom of New Japan's little men who fly, saw this god awful championship resurgence fall flat on its face once more. Eyeing up ignorance from across the pond and beyond, with its main stars currently failing to deliver, WWE has no clue what to do. It's a wasteful division, lined up with ignorance on the way and a lukewarm attitude to the motion. It cannot go anywhere and it won't. The design is also made up like a boxing title which further alienates the purpose of it all.
Triple H believes he knows what he is doing and convinces Vince McMahon to throw it all away so Hunter can feel like he is more than the McMahon plus one to the wife. Yet he has categorically destroyed WWE's business framework since dabbling in scores of ignorance hires and favoured directives. Lose the ego.
The Cruiser's, who tried to stand tall, could not and it was a another empty battle that is going nowhere. WWE need to end it by Christmas and resign it once more. It was finished before it begun and has no place in today's current WWE.
All it does is spell out how backward and useless WWE and its 'future' is lined out. It doesn't have one.
Brain Kendrick beat TJ Perkins by submission to lift the Cruiserweight Championship. No one really cared. They tried, but it failed.
Tag Team Championship
Big E and Xavier Woods (c) ? w/ Kofi Kingston Vs Cesaro and Sheamus
WWE once again mess up their own title rules which further makes a laughing stock mockery of the whole show and if you can't get your house in order, you lose the fans. Xavier Woods, who still isn't champion and Kofi Kingston is, defended the titles for the second time.
Third wheel Xavier, by WWE's direction continues to ruin the titles, its show and the whole meaning of the business. Not to mention the match was poor and filled with contempt. The match and its defense, which WWE will count, doesn't count and is a simple waste of time that is illegitimate.
Even with these choices WWE don't know who their champions are or what to do with them. Where are the ratings? The fans bailed years ago, and decisions like this only reinforce WWE's lack of ambition or direction. This is getting as clueless as Dixie Carter, and by lord, that's bad.
The oddball pairing of Cesaro and Sheamus, who wasted everyone's time with the non-ending best of seven series only to form a tag team of directionless extras by WWE's design, was another washout.
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| Stale beyond stale. |
WWE have no clue, it's that simple. This is not the entertainment fans look toward to interest them or the business in general. WWE really does suck badly.
WWE Hell in a Cell
WWE 'Raw' Women's Championship
Charlotte Flair Vs Sasha Banks (c)
In their continued efforts to try and seem like they care about female empowerment as more than just a slogan, with two of its most tiresome and bland performers, WWE decided to cave in and put the Women on as a main event.
Fans have been desperate to reinforce the idea, along with fandom boner popping ignorance director Tripe H obsessed to sell his ego of the NXT playground once more.
Look everyone, Women can be amazing too. This is no Trish Stratus/Lita era and WWE would be foolish to try and emulate that. There is simply nothing available to WWE at this time. Though WWE are in love with nepotism act Charlotte, who has never been able to be a champion of worth, merit, skill or direction. However, she is Ric Flair's daughter, so yeah, she can have bias, in WWE's eyes.
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| Well defined abdominal's |
Vince McMahon was said to be unkeen on putting this main event on. Triple H has been obsessed with trying to convince McMahon. McMahon caved in at the eleventh hour to dirt sheets online whining for the move, which has proven McMahon has lost his aura.
Many aides in WWE stated it was about "changing the perception of the man to a different way of thinking" Do they heed their own words when the only person to create female empowerment in the business as well as stabilise the entire show, namely Max Waltham, is so often snubbed by egotistical approach? Hmmmm...
Regardless, the action was poor and botch central with Charlotte. Sasha Banks, who won the gold a month ago, who had returned from an injury while failing a drugs test, was given said title. WWE, who still have yet to properly suspend Banks for her wellness violation for 30 days (Injury time does not count) WWE are quietly hoping to brush it under the carpet.
Ah yes, female empowerment. To achieve favoured success through nepotism or steroid enhancing drugs to cheat and abuse the system. Rock on, sister! Charlotte is now also calling herself Charlotte Flair, you know, after her daddy, again.
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| Stunts |
Charlotte didn't even use the Cell and climbed it from the start after ambushing an attack on Banks before entering the Cell. Charlotte threw her into tables and chairs and the like as Sash was taken aback on the stretcher job. Sasha got off and brought the action to the Cell. What a wasted moment of making such an appealing match in a change of main event testing for females. Charlotte simply became a glorified stuntwoman.
After numerous tricks and flicks and poor interactions covered by some random "ooh's" and "ahh's" this novelty interaction was first rate piss poor filler. Vince McMahon is right not to put women in the main event. Not because his 1980's attitude is that women are rubbish, simply because the women WWE have on the roster today are entirely incompetent for that role.
Yet the luvvies in WWE want to be "fans" and push this sad test through. Verdict? Egg on your face, royally. It makes WWE lose even more value and interest as supposedly respected company that can give and maintain entertainment values with relevant interests. Is it any wonder WWE have been flagging for the last two years in ratings?
We told last year investors should pull out. Never go against us, because whether you like it or not, you know, we are always right. WWE is a cesspit that is failing to boost itself over ignorance, ego and novelty acts. The end result is yet again a pathetic ending to such laughable performance.
Vince McMahon has officially lost his core by caving to such moronity.
Charlotte, now a four time champion who has done absolutely nothing interesting or engaging, beat transitional darling Sasha Banks. The match was a mess, but WWE knew that Kevin Owens would be no saviour. It was a regular in-ring match with steel padding. Yet they all are nowadays, aren't they?
PPV Rating - 1/10
Men/Women of their matches - Rusev, Bayley, Luke Gallows, Seth Rollins, Brian Kendrick, Cesaro, Sasha Banks
Man/Woman of the PPV - Charlotte
Roman Reigns and Rusev were the only pair to elevate the PPV and make it competent. The rest zapped the entire show and made a right laughing stock of it all.
Bayley and Brooke are non entities much the same as Enzo, Cass and the Baldie Boys Gallows and Anderson. No one really cares because there is nothing to appeal. Writers and producers are so bloody poor and nepotistic that WWE has lost its own emphasis on everything that is necessary to workability. It really is embarrassing and hilarious to see WWE mess itself up from within like loose chickens scrambling in its coop.
Owens continues to be the pathetic mess that will never, ever achieve anything in WWE and destroys all of WWE's titles, its performers and action. There is nothing interesting and ambitious. Why WWE continue to make a fool of themselves is beyond everyone. It makes Vince McMahon look like a complete moron. Vince clearly doesn't respect himself, the brand, company or fans any longer. Why has everyone left?
Rollins is also being pulled down and is now redundant.
Cesaro, Sheamus and New Day are tiresome bores that go nowhere.
The Cruiserweight vanilla midgets should just checkout now.
Less is more.
As for the women who can 'do what the men do' was a sad indictment to trying to seem credible and made more of a mess in that testing statement that any other era or design WWE hope to achieve. It should not have happened yet and proved to be simply lagging nonsense. WWE live in their own world of make believe. They need to open the door to the real one, not just some random whingers on dirt sheets that want some fantasy booking style. They want change, but not directionless ambition that repeats, fails to deliver and can't figure out its success. They moan about Mr Waltham, but they all secretly want him. WWE do too, but can't bring themselves to call. So is the product as it is. A complete shambles that will only pillage its improvements further. There is nothing growing in WWE for now or a decade to come. It's all WWE's own doing. McMahon really, and I mean REALLY, needs to sit down and re-evaluate everyone and everything. Oh, and adding Paul Heyman to creative won't improve either. While Heyman is a genius at making things work, he is the past. He is not the future. He can develop but isn't what is today. Him and the Eric Bischoff's etc were THAT era not THIS era. WWE needs to stop look back and move forward. They never listen and think themselves invincible. How's that working out for you?
You have my email. Until then, the show is never likely to improve with WWE's standards alone. All PPV's since Wrestlemania in March/April have been scoring 1/10 except one which was 2/10. It used to have 6's and 7's on average with the occasional 9. Will WWE ever admit it has a problem? There are serious issues that need ironing out. As of right now, WWE is a concrete mess.
You're Welcome.
© Max Waltham 03rd November 2016
All Rights Reserved
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