WWE Fastlane 2018 Review

WWE Fastlane 2018

Results from the card, live on Pay Per View on Sunday March 11th 2018, below.

Beefy. Oxen beefcake Rusev takes Daniel Bryan
copycat and takes it as a pro.

Rusev w/ Aiden English Vs Shinsuke Nakamura

Up first was a job out moment of Rusev, falling victim to ever bland non-entity Shinsuke Nakamura, making him look fantastic. Aiden English helped provide more appeal but like Rusev his Rusev Day was numbered with beatdowns for another vanilla midget of zero substance.

WWE United States Championship

Randy Orton Vs Bobby Roode (c)

Boredom zero of no personality, substance, charisma or fluidity, and trying to live off wearing a robe like Ric Flair, ignorant TNA fluffer act Bobby Roode finally dropped the title in s welcome surprise to Randy Orton. At least WWE had the sense to drop Roode after realising its categorical mistake. Orton now enters the all winner’s club of every major WWE title. Makes you wonder why WWE hated him so much to only do this now.

Tag Team

Naomi and Becky Lynch Vs Natalya and Carmella

Natalya and Carmella downed Becky Lynch and Naomi in an easy and uneventful bout of no meaning to fill a hole. It was a tense effort from everyone except Lynch, who might as well just resign instead of embarrassing herself and the division.

This was simply to build up Carmella as a strong contender as waiting Women’s champion, potentially. WWE have had two years and did nothing for her.

WWE Smackdown Tag Team Championship

The New Day (Kofi Kingston and Xavier Woods) w/ Big E Vs The Uso’s (c)

The Uso’s continue to strive hard to make the tag division appealing again, but with WWE’s attempts at racial profiling to get them over and make them black men who are ‘natural thugs’ is insulting and uncreative at best.

New Day tried to make third wheel and one of WWE’s dirties sex crazed perverts who sleeps with staff on the job, Xavier Woods, most infamous for threesomes with multiple WWE bedhopper Paige, as a title contender.

The result was a pathetic waste of time with a No Contest, which thankfully was a blessing in disguise. How Woods still hangs onto a job or place in New Day or put high on the books because of the other two is an absurdity Vine McMahon just can’t seem to see in the real world.

WWE Smackdown Women’s Championship

Charlotte Flair (c) Vs Ruby Riott

Charlotte Flair once more hogged the women’s title, this time for Smackdown, in WWE’s ultimate superstar over fluffing. Her next victim would be newcomer Ruby Riott, who taped to Charlotte’s submission while being mistreated. WWE seem to think a title match helps her, but a loss when a growing concept has stalled her once more in favour of WWE’s obsessed idolisation of Ric Flair’s daughter.

It was an empty match despite a good effort from Riott. Charlotte was just same old routine in WWE again which is lacking tender details and interactive nature.

It was all about sparing and securing Ronda Rousey. Asuka, from Raw, hopped over to challenge Charlotte for the Smackdown Women's title at Wrestlemania. Yeah, when WWE cant think what to do they just use the obvious and ruin the entire concept of what it is supposed to do.

WWE Championship

AJ Styles (c ) Vs John Cena Vs Sami Zayn Vs Kevin Owens Vs Baron Corbin Vs Dolph Ziggler

The main event was more of the same, if not worse. WWE decided to add someone new in every week as the entire crew were not good enough. Eventually they made it a six pack challenge which was a diversary boredom than excitement, but WWE had no real contenders to offer.

Along with AJ Styles being inherently boring, doing nothing champion worthy and just a stain holding the title by proxy, he dropped all superstars in a mish mash of sheer embarrassment that served no purpose going into Wrestlemania and laced no future options for any of those involved.

John Cena, of course, can magically insert himself wherever he wants and thinks he is invincible in WWE because Vince McMahon has some strange obsession with the ignorantly disgraced wife cheater and sex pest who gets many people fired backstage for his own nastiness. But hey, lets make him our kiddie favourite entertainer. Do WWE even see what is wrong with that double standard?

Didn’t Cena also leave Smackdown to become a free agent, which was not allowed because the draft sent him to Smackdown, who then ran off to Raw and is now back on Smackdown again? WWE really do make it up as they go along and fail to create strong, impressive options and instead select all the wrong talent which cripples its future prospects.

Cena was ever useless and actually helped to injury champ AJ Styles, carelessly chucking him through a table.

A jobbers title match with some bouncy stiff if ever their was one. Groundbreaking.

PPV Rating - 0/10 (That makes it THE worst ever).

Men/Women of their matches - Rusev, Randy Orton, Natalya, Jimmy Uso, Ruby Riott, Baron Corbin

Man/Woman of the PPV - Rusev

Amazing mule kick from Rusev, still
unacknowledged by WWE worth.

Fastlane became the worst PPV in WWE history. How did it get to this? The first ever 0/10? WWE still have no clue and don’t care at all, which is why it is no surprise this has occurred.

Everything was rushed, mistreated and empty, thanks to WWE's awful management of the card.

It was not worthy of anyone’s time and simply useless.

WWE need to wake up and find some serious answers, but it does not look likely at all.

It really does deserve no praise and should not be overly protected with ego or fandom. It was a disaster.

© Max Waltham 13th April 2018

All Rights Reserved

WWE Royal Rumble 2018 Review

WWE Royal Rumble 2018

Results from the show, live on PPV, Sunday 28th January, 2018, below.

AJ Styles defended the WWE Championship in a poor and pitiful 2 on 1 Handicap with fluffer friends Kevin Owens and Sami Zayn to no compelling avail. Styles retained the worthless strap which is meant to be WWE’s top prize. There was also rotten competition, if you can call it that in two inseparable herberts who offer nothing to anyone or anything in WWE.

The Uso’s kept their tag titles for Smackdown dropping Chad Gable and Shelton Benjamin in a pointless tag battle of 2 falls to nil. Gable, at one point performed a dreadful move that could have snapped someone’s neck. It was also boring amid the spot monkey flips and all that.

The Men’s Royal Rumble came next. What a mess it was. Everyone did the same routine, with better layout than previous encounters but still reverted to the same tired formula. One in one out, fodder first and favourite Indy luvvies early on to do a few crow warming fluffing up first. 

It was another wasted opportunity which saw its top stars in John Cena, Roman Reigns and Shinsuker F**kamoron in the final three. Shinsuke Nakamura eliminated Reigns to take the title opportunity in another worthless fail that has yet to create a new performer for well over ten years.

Nakamura is boring, gymnastically flawed and spot monkey driven only, which highlights a lacking level of talent and booking/hiring from the WWE ranks above. Exciting it was not.

Next was a tag team loss for Raw champs and injured Jason Jordan and Seth Rollins back to Cesaro and Sheamus, after WWE’s new tag team thrown together failed to excite or maintain position. The match, as god as it was, could not stand out and was forgettable once again.

Brock Lesnar returned in a catastrophic brawl to defend his WWE Universal Championship in a shambolic main event with two jobbers. Braun Strowman recklessly mishandled Lesnar, who potatoed him in return. The match itself was all over the place, dangerous and exposed how awful it was. Kane was there to take the pinfall, as Lesnar retained the strap in a waste of time yet again.

Stephanie McMahon in a leather bin liner.
Luv, those legs are bloody
awful in that rag.

The final match was the grand new idea of the Max Waltham Women’s revolution (stolen as conceptual by Stephanie McMahon and Triple H) to produce another “Women can do what the men can do” match. Namely the Women's Royal Rumble match. It’s getting boring now and WWE manage to zap all the life from everything the attempt to achieve. They do not know how to get it moving forward and think they are exceptional with it. The results speak differently.

This “revolutionary” match was a clearly obvious victory for Asuka, who last dumped Nikki Bella, who turned on her returning sister Brie beforehand. Filled with returning “legends” and resident football team bed post scoring sleeper with the staff, Kelly Kelly, was another pitiful shame that made it all look redundant than amazing. WWE haven't got a clue.

After Asuka won, ringside champs for Raw and Smackdown, Alexa Bliss and Charlotte Flair, respectively, meet her in the ring. Stephanie McMahon was calling the action from ringside the whole time, which was also blooming dreadful and unnatural in commentating.

Instead of Asuka’s moment of victory, which should have gone to Sonya Deville, WWE’s new signee and UFC women who no one really cares for, Ronda Rousey, arrived. She did her job and pointed to the Wrestlemania sign as everyone does. We had no answer to Asuka’s champion match opponent and Rousey, who overshadowed her moment, wanted to clearly pick up the scraps Asuka wouldn’t want. 

Yeah, just point at the sign, luv.

Again it was another waste that was simply all fluff and another wasted opportunity of nothingness.

We are glad we didn’t waste our full time on it and if WWE can’t be bothered, we aren't going to waste our time either. 

PPV Rating - 2/10

Men/Women of their matches - No one was good enough, Jimmy Uso, Rusev, Cesaro, Brock Lesnar, Sonya Deville

Man/Woman of the PPV - Ronda Rousey

WWE has landed right back to square one. Empty, clueless and devoid of any creativity. No angles, ways forth or credibility tars to utilise and hand me downs from Triple H’s obsessively ignorant Indy love-in has proven another drastic failure.

Losing millions of dollars over just two years alone on NXT, not counting main or house shows, PPV or merchandise, WWE, under Triple H’s mark fandom approach to business has not and does not hold out for a strong future at any rate. 

WWE is a bust, that still hasn't got the ability to put its company values first. All Triple H’s insanely obsessive ego and hatred continues to lead the show to self implosion on Dixie Carter-TNA standards. This is officially the airhead era for WWE under Triple H’s delusional wing. If anyone thinks Vince McMahon is doing a terrible job (and he is) Triple H’s takeover of WWE will be far worse at crashing the business thorough the floor. WWE simply want to be defiant instead of deal with incoming damage limitations which will implode.

Meh.

With ratings and hirings under Triple H’s loose ideas of success, propped up by the wife to feel important, and the McMahon family trying to make him feel a contribute asset at his grand delusions, WWE have serious flaws that won’t seem to be ironed out any time soon. WWE and Triple H are about to crash the business worse in 2018 just to survive.

TNA/Impact Wrestling and the Dixie Carter/Jeff Jarrett route took this path. WWE are following the exact same path, by Triple H’s misguided choice than respectable credibility as a businessman.

Trips just wants to be one of the guys instead of a business man who can hold favour with people for stabilising the business and workers for a future. 

WWE has none coming forward at this rate. No business acquisitions, self topping up of stock or bribes to media curators of rating numbers ‘bought’ by WWE can change that.

WWE is much the same as it was in the murky steroid era.

It’s all coming around again, with disastrous business consequences for all involved with such ignorance. Retribution will deliver.

You’re Welcome.

© Max Waltham 02nd March 2018

All Rights Reserved

WWE Survivor Series 2017

WWE Survivor Series 

2017

The troubling name-themed Pay Per View, Survivor Series, once WWE's greatest year-end Big 4 showcase once again trudged through murky waters.

Filled with filler matches, latent boredom and spot monkey moments akin to every other PPV showing this year, WWE continue to phone it in.

Lacking skill, style, challengers, contenders, champions and all round entertainers, WW still cannot fathom what is going wrong in their crazy world. They do not have time to live in any one else's and that is half the problem. Not in the loop and relying on fandom Independent luvvies already past their prime (who never scored big six months in their debuts) and filled with nostalgia and the over incessantly toxic ego of one Triple H, Survivor Series is once again doomed to oblivion.

6 Man

Tag Team

The Shield (Dean Ambrose, Seth Rollins and Roman Reigns) Vs The New Day (Kofi Kingston, Big E and Xavier Woods)

The starting event of the rehashed The Shield trio, thingy-ma-jiggy, took on their greatest challengers. The New Day. Don't all laugh at once. WWE thought it smart to place this early, and rightly so. Triple H wanted to be the main event once more and the filler show was bound to collapse.

Fan luvvies of the Indy era (real fans have left) gave "a big pop" which translates to a handful of cheers from fickle fans desperate not to admit how bad anything sucks, creatively. The New Day never stood a chance. Xavier Woods' third wheel, sex pest, backstage humping of Paige is his only calling card, and that's not something to be proud of. Kofi Kingston was the main star of the three but Big E was always given priority as the towering block Vince McMahon prefers on show.

As for the trio of Dean Ambrose, Roman Reigns and Seth Rollins, aka The Flounderers with nothing going for them but have been spared release because WWE have nothing for themselves to rely upon, The Shield pummelled The New Day in a cheap, rushed and rather lukewarm spot match filled with gimmicks to get cheap fans roaring. Slim pickings.

One word description? 

Meh.

10 Man

Tag Team

Alicia Fox (Team Captain), Nia Jax, Asuka, Sasha Banks, and Bayley Vs Becky Lynch (Team Captain), Carmella, Tamina Snuka, Naomi, and Natalya

How do we keep the divas, sorry 'Women's' revolution (which Max Waltham made and Stephanie and Triple H take credit for, yet solely destroyed with dolly birds) relevant?

A 'traditional' (which means we can't be bothered to think up something new and creative so just chuck all the females out there in one mish mash) match up to fill time.

As if anyone couldn't fathom the odd one out, Asuka, new, fresh and highly raised in profile from last month's match with recently released talent Emma, which WWE let go over bitterness that she stated writers weren't giving her any opportunities (which they weren't) WWE needed to protect Asuka in a now fragile WWE environment. 

A skilled star among a rabble of jobbers, botchers and hanger-ons that can't deliver anything more for this failed project of Triple H's moronic ego fest hatred. Blatant communication of details in the match, falling about everywhere and a right bloody mess of it all, this was the typical diva match shambles WWE has never moved on from. 

It came down to Asuka against recently dethroned Smackdown Women's champions Natalya, who tapped out so Asuka could be the 'sole survivor' which WWE feel gives her some credibility. It does not. She has no being or essence and only Emma made her relevant. WWE have cost Asuka big time with random call ups and no opportunities. Asuka was only on WWE's radar three years ago when Max Waltham complimented her veteran talents to the profession. WWE may just scupper it for her.

It was a few pity cheers that the favourite won among the vest of a bad bunch, but there was no real feeling at all involved.

The Miz Vs Baron Corbin

Another champion verses champion battle which, like the PPV, made zero sense in what become an unexplained brand battle supremacy that had absolutely no prize at all in the end results. Another thrown together pity card. Don't WWE fans deserve better? The real paying fans left when WWE short changed them over the past 2 and a half years. The time when Triple H and his Indy luvvies of ignorant from NXT took favouritism lunacy than professional skill. The future is bright.

WWE decided to let Baron Corbin win over The Miz to establish him as a growing star who has not developed in two years on the main roster of Smackdown. WWE want to avoid the in-house bullying against him, as well as being short on names, to seem like it cares.

It was empty, pitiful and had no skill, filled with pedestrian exchanges and botched fluidity.

In reality, The Miz recently announced he's having a baby with real life wife Maryse, which saw The Miz drop the Intercontinental Championship on the post Survivor Series Raw, to, wait for it... Roman Reigns. The IC curse lives on. 

Tag Team

The Uso's Vs Sheamus and Cesaro

The Uso's dropped Sheamus and the ever talented, one man show that is Cesaro. Apart from his skill and working with very talented competition in The Uso's this match was great in technique, but WWE booked it as filler. When WWE don't respect their talent, even the best on the show become forgettable. No one remembers it, which is a shame as even Sheamus has been re-invigorated slightly in his improving in-ring skills. What was the prize? Nothing.

Alexa Bliss Vs Charlotte Flair

A battle of the Women's champions. What a laugh. Alexa 'best of a bad bunch' Bliss took on what was to be Natalya, dropped at the eleventh hour for Charlotte 'WWE's overhyped failure favourite living off family heritage' Flair. The pair tried their best but it was still too meek, green, clumsy and rushed. In efforts to stand out Charlotte often ruins herself by being too forceful, clumsy and desperate to prove to fans she can go. She needs to learn the inner workings better and she might just be able to improve. I'm not her tutor. 

As for Bliss, her action was weak, covering for WWE fave Charlotte and the division once more suffered as a result of both on show. WWE would have had a better match if Natalya was there, but WWE still can't get it in their head as to what works, and runs back into comfortability angles. It's all been seen far too often and nothing is fresh. WWE is as stale as a rotten cucumber.

Charlotte Flair defeated Alexa Bliss with ease, which made her entire reign over however many months up to this point wasted viewing for all WWE fans hoping for more meaningful 'stuff'.

It was short, laboured and messy.

Brock Lesnar  w/ Paul Heyman Vs AJ Styles 

Go on, kiss him again.
You know you want to...
(Well, maybe not him).

Battle of the champions now. (Again). This time it's the proper people, the guys. Milk carton poster boy Brock Lesnar took on recently crowned WWE Champion (like Charlotte/Natalya) AJ Styles, who dropped Jinder 'the terrorist themed, Indian market expansion cash in, jobber doped on steroids' Mahal.

He is NOT on 'roids.
Repeat, he is NOT on 'roids...

Even Vince knew Mahal would be no match for Lesnar, so instead he gave the main heavyweight title to a loserweight, sorry cruiserweight, action man figurine who jumps around with five moves like all cruisers who need a fly swatter.

Brock Lesnar predictably crushed AJ Styles with ease which has become a theme of crap matches that fans want to attune their anger of WWE into Max Waltham vessel Brock Lesnar as "The Beast" to silence and pummel the ever useless crap on show. Thing is, it's not working, even here, is it? Again it was boring fluff, silly moments and AJ doing daft nonsense that made WWE as much a laughing stock as Dixie Carter's then TNA. Triple H has gone down the same route, with disastrous consequences. 

Another misused talent lost
by WWE's narcissistic hate. 

Last week WWE also released talented and often misused opportunity James Ellsworth. WWE are trimming its budget of what it thinks is expendable yet throws away its actual talent because it has no creative ideas and Triple H's lunatic overspending on indy ignorance luvvies that dont materialise. Many on the roster who don't deserve to be there and threatening WWE's future front and back are still employed. Fans have left. WWE are deluded. 

10 Man 

Tag Team

Kurt Angle (Team Captain), Triple H, Braun Strowman, Samoa Joe, and Finn Balor Vs Shane McMahon (Team Captain), Randy Orton, Bobby Roode, Shinsuke Nakamura, and John Cena

The Raw roster, at its finest.

Up last was the main event, which somehow contained missing for months egotist Triple H as the main attraction. Wow. Everyone plays second fiddle when Trips wants his obscene moment back in the spotlight to feel important. Can the man who has been destroying WWE's future with ignorance hires and piss poor business acumen really put his ego aside? The spot was originally announced to growing upstart, Jason Jordan.

Vanilla Series.

Since his three years of NXT 'headliners' and delusional claptrap endorsements of them, WWE, under Triple H, has lost scores of ratings, credibility, investors, stock and actual stardom. Don't be fooled by WWE topping up their own stock to save face. Even ratings bribes to tabulators and empty stands of house show embarrassment wont patch that massive sinkhole. Be careful what you wish for. Triple H always has to play games. Ones that never benefit WWE, advertisers, investors or the business, which is highly in decline as we foretold from 2017. And we have been right. 2018 will be worse.

So what was special about this lunacy?

Well, Shinsucker F**kamoron gave Finn 'fag' Balor a head bowing lapdance to his crotch which Balor responded to with a finger dab to his forehead. Wow. These two really are the future of WWE from that ignorance infested overseas hole, which wasn't when Max Waltham discovered it for WWE, in New Japan.

Oooh!
 Comedy Cena takes a tumble.

The other ignorance darling and TNA reject Bobby 'always trying to be Triple H in TNA' Roode, who hasn't even done a single thing in WWE of merit and looks as empty of personality than ever before, filled the numbers.

Samoa 'plodding along' Joe, who returned from injury, was also there, for god knows why.

John Cena was eliminated, who is now back on Smackdown after jumping to Raw in June/July. Say what? 

Randy Orton, the only actual star WWE have was once more dropped after open critique on Triple H's failed pet projects including Kevin 'the ratings dropped' Owen and his sidekick Sami 'coast along' Zayn. 

Kurt Angle almost won the show, but ego ridden nutjob Triple H turned on the Raw captain and cost him an elimination to be eliminated. Kurt Angle's in-ring returns have been an utter mess, and in denial his body is falling apart from it. He shouldn't have bothered.

Eventually Shane McMahon was dropped so Triple H could reign supreme with Vince McMahon's towering obsession in useless non-entity Braun 'brown' Strowman. To look like he wasn't going into business for himself, Triple H seemed to be 'doing something for others' (after destroying the entire products stars minutes ago) with Braun. Knowing Braun issues no creative threat to Hunter, Trips let him beat him up a bit after the bell.

The tally for Raw or Smackdown also became highly predictable throughout the show. The grand prize was nothing and won't be and cannot be followed up on. Once more WWE don't seem to realise how the show had no 'attraction' and lost its own core identity in its 'traditional' set up.

I win. Again. (Say's you).

Misses has joined in pitying
the trophy husband. 

The show ended, but Triple H, as he does, could not resist himself. With his beautiful wife Stephanie McMahon coming to his aide, and provocatively lowering herself in full camera view of her open legs almost flashing her vagina, and bulging breast about to pop out, Tripper had something else planned.

He took a long time to get up, trying to, and very pathetically, raise to his feet, staggering around the ring and falling over like a comedy skit that raised a couple of pity laughs. If this is entertainment, pretending to fall around and feel loved but being a desperate fool, then Triple H has succeeded.

When leaving he pretended not to see the titantron partition leading to the back and turned and smacked face first into it.

Erm...

The only laugh it generated was a desperate attempt to feel loved and exposed just how toxic the ego of Triple H is to WWE's failing product, which Vince McMahon feels he has to keep happy, now that his ignorant wife Stephanie chose of her own violation to become so, after a good track record. She has done this herself and will have to be prepared for the storm she has purposely created for herself. Vince once told her to keep quiet the next time she has another one of her "bright ideas" last year. Now she's got more of them it seems. Kids today. They just jump in without and business acumen of risk assessment. Money does not equal success. WWE are creatively bankrupt.

As for Survivor Series it was yet again another empty, filler PPV with no talent and all useless moments of WWE 'wrestling by the numbers' and coining it in (not very well) and also faking attendance numbers yet again. When will they ever learn what will equal success?

Yay! Triple H draws!

HaHaHa! What a laugh. 

You're Welcome.

PPV Rating - 1/10

Men/Women of their matches - Seth Rollins, Natalya, The Miz, Cesaro, Alexa Bliss, Brock Lesnar, Randy Orton

Man/Woman of the PPV - Triple H

© Max Waltham 22nd November 2017

All Rights Reserved