TNA chose to present its first One night Only Pay Per View
concept with an X-Division extravaganza. Playing off of the x letter and
putting it into virtually all its match branding would this PPV be of interest,
honour and brimming with talented entries?
Airing on April 5th 2013 the PRE-TAPED PPV from
January 12 2013 took place from the Impact TV studios in Orlando, Florida.
X-scape Match
Jimmy Rave, Matt Bentley, Puma, Sam Shaw, Christian York, Alex
Silva and Lince Dorado
Most of the world and TNA’s audience hadn’t heard of these
names and no-one even cared. What an absolute disaster. The highly
dysfunctional sixteen minute scrap was won by Christian York.
Tag Team
Anthony Nese and Rashad Cameron Vs Doug Willaims and Kid
Kash
Flabbergasting Doug Williams gave an outstandingly dismal
performance of basic moves that was so boring and wet that no even his opponent
came off well. Kid Kash changed the pace and style tremendously on Cameron
included with a high flying missing Moonsault as rashad moved. Nese was swiftly
tagged in and gave fantastic punches, dropkicks and suplexes making an
extraordinary impact instantly with a two fall cover. Williams came in and
botched a clothesline that failed to connected as Nese quickly masked Williams inaccuracies
with skill. Nese dropped both opponents after a double assault and joined
Rashad in nailing Willaims with a running knee connective. Rashad took off
Kashoutside as inside action continued with Nese giving a perfect drop leg
baseball slide dropkick. A two fall only after Earl Hebner messed a count
again. Douglas Williams capitalised with a rolling chaos pin on Nese after Kid Kash smacked
Nese which was a disgraceful ending from woeful Williams who should have never
been in the ring as a result.
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| Douglas Williams is so fit! Look at that body! |
Robbie E Vs Chavo Guerrero
Inpromptu Special Referee – Joseph Park
The Zack Ryder rip off Robbie E, entering to a hilariously
sad VIP cordon gave a promo which failed to gain any motion. Chavo joined and babbled
on about the Eugene rip off retard Joseph Park and installed him as impromptu
special referee. This match had no momentum. Chavo Guerrero hit the three amigos and
head to the top corner post to frog splash for a three fall.
X Division Championship
Fatal 4 Way X Match
Kenny King (c) Vs Rubix Vs Mason Andrews Vs Zema Ion
Tenay and Tazz’s commentary was disgraceful and not innovate
in the slightest. The X-division match was extremely sloppy and a pitiful
exchange. Timing all over the place with Jigsaw and Ion, Andrews a colossal
bore and Ion forgettable.
Pithy non eventful kick from Ion atop the ring climb above
the ring with Andrews was wasteful. The most ludicrous decision made when Rubix
grabbed the X title sign only for Kenny King to enter and electric chair drop
the puzzle piece masked star and steal the
X signal thing with rules relating to when you touch the mat holding the
title. TNA just proved utterly pathetic with this booking where Kenny King is a
fraud champion who also has no real interest as champion either.
Tag Team
Christopher Daniels and Kazarian Vs Petey Williams and
Sonjay Dutt
So Cal Val gave a laughable introduction of the bland boys
Daniels and Kaz as “one of the most dominant tag teams” in TNA. Kazarian gave a
terrible promo including mentioning “Sonjay Dutch” Daniels followed with an
equally lame level of speech.
Jeremy bore-rash instantly interviewed their opponents.
Williams showed a level of potential in a fair promo and Dutt added a decent
entry despite being an empty face.
During the match, Dutt gave a level of heart and attempt to
make it something consistent however had no real interest in his build up that
was a throwaway attempt. The maple leaf muscle Petey Williams, of which TNA
dropped years ago, the former two time X divison champ gave an impressive and
compactful return match which held the match together despite Kaz and Daniels
awful portrayals inside the match and their lazy approach favoured by TNA. Kaz’s
roll over and bounce in the air on a sell of Petey Williams finisher to win the
match was just laughable. Sonjay Dutt picked up the win as a result. Daniels
even carried his partner out over his shoulders, adding to a complete farce of
what was just witnessed on live television.
No disqualification
Jerry Lynn Vs Rob Van Dam
Wrestling stalwart Jerry Lynn entered in part of his “retirement
tour” to complete his legitimate retiring from the sport. Taking on old
adversary Rob Van Dam, who has no become a former shadow of himself with a
minimal effort upon entry alone, began with a back hold lock up from Lynn and
Van Dam countered, with a pin attempt roll up from Lynn in a technical compete.
Headlock from Lynn to return numerous run over counters by both then changed
pace slamming clothesline on Van Dam sending him outside.
Van Dam soon brought chairs and tables into the battle, as
Tenay told us to “bear in mind” this was a No DQ match. Van Dam had trouble
lifting Lynn who flew over into the ring and got the better of Dam again. Lynn
gained the upper hand in a good transition to set tables up from outside. Van
Dam joined and sent Lynn inside once more. Lynn gave a pleasing powerbomb off
top turnbuckle flinging Dam onto a centered flat laid chair. Van Dam took
change and walked around with chair, back turned on Lynn who surged a charge at
Dammer into a table at the corner. Lynn soon showed respect by lying for the
five star from splash as possum to lock the Mahistrol Cradle for a two fall. Spin
kick missed resulting in back of head leg drop from Lynn onto Dam landing in
the chair again. Dam failed to launch Lynn over well onto the chair and hook a
pin convincingly. Lynn returned with a two fall after. Dam jumped up and kicked
Jerry off the top climb to the outside onto the table out there only for a two
fall inside. Rob Van Dam then hit the frog splash three quarters over the ring to gain
the three fall and win the match. Fans were uninterested with the lethargic win.
After the match Lynn received a hero’s welcome from the
lockeroom who appeared on the titantron ramp to give their celebratory
endorsements of respect to the wrestling veteran who formed a huge level of
change, interest and respect in the wrestling business who won’t fully be
recognised by mainstream stages. Lynn gave pal Van Dam a win to help him along
in his career with a victory. On this occasion, TNA should have insisted Lynn
win. He earned that right.
Austin Aries Vs Samoa Joe
Borash forgot his lines and paused before interviewing Aries
before his match. ‘Money maker’ Austin Aries was called upon for the main event
and gave lummox Joe a chance to be interesting.
“We have the best talent and the best stars.” Said “the greatest
man who ever lived” as Aries believed the two best in the company would
showcase what makes this company.
Action was slow as predicted with Joe allowed to dominant
the mild arrogance of Aries. Both took a brief moment of pause in the ring which didn't really highlight greatness at all and only to mask the next shortcoming.
It lost momentum to say the least and returned with Joe only pushing down Aries
before tedious punched before Aries was on the floor again. A tacky headbutt
would follow with drop down work from the wasteful Joe who couldn't even touch
the boot convincingly on Aries face in stomping attacks which was one of the most
basic moves in pro wrestling.
Aries was soon hurled over the guard rail in another pointless
exchange which was boring personified.
There was no colour, contrast or passion. Aries deserves
better than that. The ending couldn't come quick enough, where Aries was
afforded the win in a cheap and meaningless finish that didn't give him any
endorsement to a sustained and further powerful character in this troubled
company. Austin Aries won with a turnbuckle roll up. Shameful.
PPV Rating - 3/10
Men/Women of their matches - Alex Silva, Anthony Nese, Chavo Guerrero, Kenny King, Petey Williams Jerry Lynn, Austin Aries
Man/Woman of the PPV - Jerry Lynn
TNA should be ashamed of booking that main event disaster.
Aries had to do everything and couldn’t work with the slothness of Joe despite
trying his damned hardest to do so. Aries lost huge proportions of his skill in
doing so in what became a boring match from both because Aries was in a one man
show. It was just as worse as Eric Young wrestling a mannequin.
Chavo and the other one was simply a nothing match.
 |
Wore wonderful green
and orange skirt |
All a little rushed, and timing issues from TNA not accurately
applied, TNA could have scheduled an extra portion of time to allow them their
leisure to make spots more impactful. However, it was a credible match from
both with the time they had out there.
Disgraceful booking of washed up Douglas Williams going over
Nese who made the match a perfect bout with Kash was plain ignorant. Cameron
put in a fair performance, though Kash and Nese were the stars shining. TNA’s
failure to constantly book Nese credibly proves how out of touch with the new
age they really are only to enhance their company’s levels of arrogance in
backstage politics from three people who have no clue on wrestling understanding.
TNA’S terrible branding and X- lunacy placed on every word, mirrored by the fact they
recorded the PPV three months prior and aired it instead of making it live was
a mass ignorance that proved monumental disgrace to the business, performers and highlighted that TNA, as a company, is in utter chaos of clueless
intentions, formation and understanding how to book anything or anyone. TNA is
rapidly becoming the most bungled company on the planet. It is utterly
shameful. What a shambles.
© Max Waltham 24th April 2013
