Money in the Bank 2016
Live on Pay Per View from the T-Mobile Arena in Las Vegas, Nevada, WWE presented its seventh Money in the Bank Pay Per View. Would it be oh so lucky for WWE, taking such a gamble on its loosely overflowing card?
Let's find out...
Tonight WWE re-opened its doors to a number of WWE stars in the hope of becoming its new number one contender in waiting over twelve months or less, namely scoring the Money in the Bank contract briefcase. With only two real stars worthy of victory, and WWE's lack of roster talent on offer, the match itself is in severe doubt at value or entertainment. A reflection of WWE's modern era is also under high scrutiny, something they seem not so interested to care about.
Tag Team Championship
Tag Team
Fatal Four Way
The New Day (c) w/ Xavier Woods Vs Enzo Amore and Big Cass Vs The Vaudevillains Vs Karl Anderson and Luke Gallows
The Vaudevillians (Simon Gotch and Aiden English) have been the hottest team and refreshing air the division needed since their two month call up to main roster. WWE have once again failed to push them forward and stalled them to the titles with more lukewarm efforts. WWE have no ambition at this point and continue to phone in their decision making as well as its matches.
Work the crowd Enzo and Cass rambling fluffers to warm up crowd for PPV. It made no sense. Sexual references with Lady Luck. She smiles down on you and laughs right now. Spelling Bee Cass was not a hoot.
Dapper Gentleman from the backstreets of Ye Olde London arrive. Very debonair. :)
Bookend chicken legs strode in, in a PVC leather coat to no effect and points up. Thrilling cast off before even beginning.
Grinding titles disgrace. It's not funny. It's sad and tacky. Chewbacca impression. Pathetic. Monopoly Men jibes at the VV's now. They joked about collecting $200. I'll collect something from them, alright. :) Then the baldies got Booty O'ed. This interlude was painful to watch. New Day's title reign was mentioned at 301 days having to beat 334. So the tag division is a bust again for history book scribbles? How sad for WWE. No conviction.
This could have been the most exciting match if it wasn't for the rushed sloppiness and whopping boy mentality of Aiden English.
Dolph Ziggler Vs Baron Corbin
After having three back to back pre-show matches in a nothing feud, Dolph and Barry Corbin were upgraded to the main card. Last month WWE said it was their rubber match. Even WWE can't be bothered to tell the truth or stick to it. This is already dire and has nothing to offer. No-one cares and neither star is interesting. WWE cheating the viewers once more. Great entertainment.
By the time it made the main stage three months too late, it was already over as a toilet break.
Loudly heard calling spots and the crowd yelled "Boring" in response. Score!
Baron Corbin won to no effect despite effort the match was drained from the get go by WWE booking. The crowd was non-existent. Why WWE thought it was solid was plain confusing.
Tag Team
Charlotte and Dana Brooke Vs Natalya and Becky Lynch
WWE lauded her uneventful reign at 273 days. Simply holding titles doesn't make a champion in the record books, but WWE thinks that will do. How boring and weak of them. Dana Brooke's childish mannerisms were also likened to a five year old.
Dana tried to prove herself with Natalya first which became absolutely dreadful.
Becky 'stink' Lynch was in next to jump around and fall short of the top. At least she has border line ignorance at Pretty Wrangling Garbage events.
The match continued its tepid flow of emptiness. Call me when it's over.
Natalya' big moment came with a Sharpshooter, which was the only highlight, if that's what we can call it. Animated Dana Brooke grabs were simply pathetic. Charlotte lands a Facebuster as Dana Brooke distracts the referee with hollering to pick up another cheated victory in another boring WWE run through of no value.
Dean Ambrose made a weak and empty promo which was plain tiresome.
Apollo Crews Vs Sheamus
Next up is some green wannabee used for his skin tone than skillset. The green flapjack replacement for Titus O'Neil in Apollo Crews is not only unflattering but severely flawed in entertainment value. No personality, no drive and a spot booking, WWE have always been desperate to try and make a black star of agile frame not matter how racist it is booked to avoid the race issue WWE has with never respecting black culture. No black star apart from The Rock has been made. (Yet fans have often fiercely debated that The Rock isn't technically black). Talk to the fans about it, you'll find a hotbed of polarising opinion.
Highly ignorant flounder Apollo Crews, who seems to have served only a month in NXT training before a main roster call up donation to 'skills' transferable, was booked against Sheamus. A pathetic booking plea to encourage fans to be manipulated into chanting for Crews over their hate of Sheamus, who still has nothing useful to offer wrestling at this time, despite WWE and Triple H's gym buddy being favoured for nothing.
This was yet another nothing match that had no moments and nothing sustainable to offer. Botch fest.
No reaction and bland as emulsion.
 |
| Evergreen |
Stop and start moments and two draining stars zapped all the energy from a good PPV potentially. Not even Sheamus can still get over. WWE need to seriously think on the drawing board.
An hour in to the PPV and it feels like three. Damn. Tough break.
Apollo Crews secured a cheap roll up on Sheamus to get a dishourable failed pin after Sheamus did all the work and argued with the referee. Crews just took a White Noise off the top turnbuckle and failed to sell the move at all. All teeth and no style.
John Cena Vs AJ Styles
Superhero John Cena has returned to WWE to take on some flying looney tune in Action Man AJ Styles. The man who has been treading water with ignorance in WWE since his lacklustre debut months ago had the perfect opponent to get some sympathy cheers. No Cena love doesn't equal AJ stardom. AJ, a pint size spot monkey, has nothing to offer, even in recent title matches which saw him more than uneventful. Triple H is so clever at hiring ignorance on personal fandom choices that have crushed WWE over the last two years, huh? Are the ratings down?
A Dream Match they billed it as. Who came up with that? Some TNA douche against a WWE douche? Sounds about right then. It aint CM Punk / Daniel Bryan by any standards.
You can be praised by marks all you like, fanzines and dirt sheets amount for nothing for guys like AJ Styles. This is WWE, son.
AJ Styles enters with his arms open and stands there still like an extra. Styles is one in a line of many who is simply the middle man when WWE need a break from title and event change ups. Fluffer central.
Running the ropes. Yay! Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...
Headlocks and holdups.
Heard calling spots loudly.
Slow.
Walking around mat work. Pitiful.
People will tell themselves what they want to hear. Yay for the fans!
If this is what a Dream Match constitutes in today's age, Sloppy, loose, inaccurate transitions, Wrestling really is dumbed down.
STF on Styles. Rope reached by AJ.
Jumped up onto Cena AA as AJ rolls him through to a lying mat single leg Boston Crab called Calf Crusher. Cena reaches the rope break. Cena clotheslines AJ to hard effect as he attempts the Knuckle fall. Cena waits for AJ to get up in stalled time too long to lift AJ for the Attitude Adjustment. Styles kicks out at two as the pair are on their backs.
Cena tried selling the leg pain but then easily walked to the outside with it lifting finely. He jumped from the top as AJ countered. Styles wakes and lays over Cena for a cheap two fall.
AJ lands the Styles Clash as Cena kicks out of the roll up at two. To his credit Cena locked his arms behind Styles' legs perfectly. That was the only highlight in this match.
Styles did more flips as all he can do which land him on Cena's knees to wind him. The pair attempted a re-run of five minutes ago, countering every move until Styles inadvertently whacked the referee out the match as Cena lands the AA to get a three fall victory pin.
AJ's boyfriends Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson came in to beat down John Cena and place AJ Styles onto Cena to win as the official gathers himself to count the call.
Ha!! AJ Styles can't even win properly. Some classic man. Always an Action Man mid carder hoping for the big time.
There we have it. Styles can't win a match against the heavyweights in WWE.
Money in the Bank
Ladder
Cesaro Vs Chris Jericho Vs Sami Zayn Vs Dean Ambrose Vs Kevin Owens Vs Alberto Del Rio
Once more WWE laced the entire jobbers filling match supposed to get someone over as Heavyweight title material featured multiple high ignorance dirtbags.
Highly ignorant racist Alberto Del Rio, Highly ignorant blubber boy Kevin Owens and ignorant old hag Chris Jericho honestly could not offer anything new, original or worthwhile as a champion in waiting. What an embarrassment for WWE. Yet WWE still never learn and simply defiance will never win them such. Ratings are down. These have contributed to it.
Kevin Owens' biggest challenge isn't to unhook the case, it's to climb and not fall off the ladder with balancing issues.
"Ole, Ole, Ole, Ole..." Taxi for Zayn.
Cesaro charged the ladder onto Jericho who tried to use it on him. All brawled outside as Sami Zayn did his spot jumping over the rope on everyone again. Zayn and Owens jiggled their guts tossing over a ladder as he kicked Zayn and Owens screamed like a child again making no sense at all. Jericho shut the bumbling oaf down with a ladder as Owens tumbled over once more.
Rio now has his ladder moment placing on the top of the turnbuckle, Cesaro blocked and upper-cutted them all in the ring to elbow train Ambrose, Rio and Jericho in the corners. The audience was fully compelled until floating waiter in the wings Owens bumbled in to get another back attack. Owens then "went Bowling" as JBL added as the bowling ball with legs followed Cesaro's lead.
Sami Zayn then came in and did his. He began the first climb, all alone. Del Rio makes the save.
Cesaro was upside down on a ladder laid beneath the turnbuckle as Rio had a big moment built only to tepidly foot stomp on Cesaro. Wasted moment. Rio climbs. Cesaro climbs and stops Rio with Rio locking in a cross armbreaker as Kevin Owens gets another opportunity to appear and disappear. Cesaro stopped him and Dean Ambrose takes out Cesaro in another whirlwind moment changer with everyone. Ambrose and Jericho had it out as Y2J slammed the Codebreaker. Jericho began the slow, mountainous climb. He got his hands on it as Sami Zayn peeped himself up.
Textbook save as Kevin the lazy bones Owens tipped the ladder over. Rio stopped him so he could roll around the matt some more.
Cesaro returned to deal with Del Rio. Clear and able, the Cesaro swing on Rio pleased the crowd. It looked like it gave Alberto Del Rio an erection. Cesaro did it to Jericho too.
Ambrose retuned as Owens slithered in on the ground like a bumbling sluig. He whacked a ladder on Ambrose as his back was turned. Owens did a body splash on Ambrose over a ladder. Use your assets, I suppose. Not much else there, huh?
Surprise! Sami Zayn and Owens go at it again. Zzzzzzzzzzzzz...Zayn beautifully "bent Owens in half" after an amazing Michinoku Driver dropped Owens onto the ladder.
Zayn took to the air to climb. Del Rio returned to use the ladder to smash him off. They were tiny taps that looked ineffective. Rio then set a ladder longways between the main ladder and turnbuckle as Jericho climbed the back of the ladder with Zayn and Rio battling the other side. Cesaro sets the ladder on the other side as everyone clambers on now. It was a moment, that's for sure.
Cesaro sets a new ladder as Del Rio returns. All six are going for it. Cesi and Bertie are sent off with Cesaro's goolies caught on the ropes. :(
Zayn is back on top reaching. Jericho runs along the ladder bridge as Ambrose nabs at his feet. Dirty Deeds off the bridge stops Jericho. Kevin Owens returns to drop Zayn. Zzzzzzz.... He powerbombs him on the ladder and screams again as he bumbles over to the top, greeted by Dean Ambrose.
Kevin Owens falls back and drops down through the ladder as Ambrose shames him. Dean Ambrose unhooks the briefcase after a long tease to become the winner of the Money in the Bank in a rather tepid encounter with little effort from Ambrose to seem worthy winner. The typecast test will be his biggest.
 |
| Last year failed, this year success. |
Too predictable and boring. No drive and another wasted opportunity in a nothing victory. The win is meant to be all in abundance. There were only two contenders, with Cesaro the latter, though WWE would not consider him.
United States Championship
Rusev (c) w/ Lana Vs Titus O'Neil
Fresh back from wrongful suspension for jokingly touching Vince McMahon, the man was given a title opportunity to silence the masses that WWE could well be racist or simply unfair to black people. Another political decision that backfired in WWE's face nonce more.
Rusev checks out Titus' kids at ringside as the pair run around the corner to a double clothesline outside.
Rusev clipped Titus after a climb on the steel steps which O'Neil took perfectly. Rushed power moves where this match could and should have gone on earlier with more time to be better effective. This was more match worthy than the first hour of boring trash.
Rusev tainted Titus in front of his children on Father's Day in a sit down back hold.
Titus returned with some powerful shoulder blocks. Rusev recovered as swung his own brute force to knock Titus for six. Rusev gave Titus strong chances to be powerful again taking a heavy smash down with grace and honour most do not choose to work for their opponent. Titus was also given a two cover.
Rusev showed more drive and personality than anyone else in the last how many hours on a tepid PPV, in a short match where the Accolade crushed Titus O'Neil as Rusev retains the United States Title.
Rusev told Titus' kids to look at their loser father on this special day. If only they had more time.
WWE World Heavyweight Championship
Seth Rollins Vs Roman Reigns (c)
After returning last month and jumping straight into the title scene with no story whatsoever, Seth Rollins billed as 'the man who never lost the title' was set to reclaim it from old pal turned rival Roman Reigns. Reigns, a man who had no support and still doesn't as three time champion (twice transitional failure) is meant to be the main event but both have somehow drained the momentum.
WWE still using The Shield of three years past to sell this feud once again. Give it up already. We've gone past this haven't we? Is WWE still that far in the past it can't create future?
With ten minutes left to the end of the show, WWE spent eight minutes on the video package and four for the entrances and one for introductions. Eek. Talk about stretched time mismanagement. A main event with just seven minutes? Hmmm... They also rang the bell before Lillian announced them and referee holding up title. What a fail. The ref got the bell rung again. Another minute gone.
Roman Reigns entered to sheer hate from the audience for being forced on them by WWE's misguided leaders.
lock up and barge downs, mostly in Reigns' favour. Seth offers quick counters and knee barges Roman outside to launch on him for momentum. Back in the ring imminently landed into a Samoan Drop by Reigns.
"You Can't Wrestle" and "Roman Sucks" began ringing after WWE failed to improve Roman's in-ring direction. Reigns continued to walk around unsure of what to do. It is not a good look for a champion, let alone a star hoping to be something for WWE's future.
Reigns formed into John Cena Mark II again with clubbing blows to Rollins in the corner. Rollins walked into a Whirl Slam for a two. Fans were uninterested. Pay Per View time has now officially extended. Oops!
Rollins ironically then slapped Roman Reigns in the face. Reigns did the clubbing blows to no effect next, as did Rollins with animated jabs.
Rollins was flung outside like a chump with no chance of getting back into the game from "ring rust" commentary earlier stated.
Roman dismantles the announce table as the crowd are pleased off that much. Rollins is battered to a pulp like a limp noodle as he gets a return by knocking Reigns into the Steel Steps. Reigns landed a very good Razor's Edge powerbomb pin after a long time getting it going, taken perfectly by Rollins.
Reigns missed his trademark Punch not being so super as Seth tries to stand. Roman inadvertently helps him flip up to gain the advantage as Rollins barges to the outside on Reigns twice, yet the second time went over Reigns and botched somewhat. Oh well.
Rollins tries someone else's move with the Pedigree only to have Roman Reigns punch him down. Reigns got a close two fall. Seth Rollins lands a Frog Splash of the late Eddie Guerrero to a tight two fall.
Caught on top turnbuckle, Reigns tries a suplex as Seth tries to counter with running powerbomb to opposite turnbuckle on Reigns with a heel kick to the face for a strong two count.
Rollins runs up for a suplex rolled into second suplex on the ground from the turnbuckle for a tense two fall once again. Reigns almost lost that one.
Reigns powered up and single handidly clutch powerbombed Seth down for a near fall with perfection from both.
Rollins flips another turnbuckle powerbomb as Reigns counters on a fall with a last ditch Superman Punch.
Roman Reigns runs into a Pedigree as the intensity is amplified by a near fall on tenderhooks. Seth Rollins hits the Pedigree one more time to cover and become the new WWE World Heavyweight Champion to shock and adulated awe.
WWE World Heavyweight Championship
Dean Ambrose Vs Seth Rollins (c)
Now Dean Ambrose arrives to greet Seth Rollins. He nails Rollins with the briefcase and officially cashes it in.
Dean Ambrose hits the Dirty Deeds to become the new WWE World Heavyweight Champion from Seth Rollins.
May have made statement but after the hype the fit of champ to lacking direction will not elevate a star. Sorry, it's true. Empty, weak and wasteful re-runs of the trio from years past. WWE need to timewarp to the present day to lay the future. It is the same old repetitive nature WWE proves therefore it has no understanding of what to do.
The show also overran by 20 or so minutes. Strange when they could have simplified the time of earlier matches (Corbin/Ziggler) or scrapped it altogether. It was a late addition to bump the card anyway, which in hindsight, categorically failed.
The show is over.
Pre-Show
No-one cared.
Golden Truth, R-Truth and Goldust beat Breezango, Fandango and Tyler Breeze.
The ignorance of Kalisto with pard Sin Cara beat homophobic ignorant Bubba Ray Dudley and his brother D'von, who filled the show with botches equally with the midget jumper. WWE must be so proud to have re-hired novelty acts that cannot attain any worth to a future.
PPV Rating - 3/10
Men/Women of their matches - Aiden English, Dolph Ziggler, Natalya, Sheamus, John Cena, Sami Zayn, Rusev, Seth Rollins, Seth Rollins
Man/Woman of the PPV - Rusev
The matches could not have been more obvious to the trained eye. The novelty of all three champs in one night facing each other passing around a trinket for all to become meaningless. Classic. Such a transition can be more harm than good. It was all so predictable but for some caught up in the match quality and their hate of Roman Reigns they forgot about a cash in which provided some interest, albeit short. Reigns is trying but is doomed and WWE knew it needed to move the strap along. Seth Rollins never lost but winning and losing as the middle man is somewhat dangerous for a career boost. Dean Ambrose as standing victor provided fandom but outside of it, the bubble will burst on the typecast loon. WWE need new options, but Ambrose like Reigns before him is highly green and unfit for title prominence. Not bothered to write for him and sidelined for Reigns, Ambrose has the toughest challenge on his shoulders now more than ever with huge expectations.
Despite the big moments, none of the three were still enough to provide character and depth that Rusev did in only half the time. Rusev should have had much more time available. A pure pro who has come leaps and bounds.
Once the initial buzz wears off, the brand extension, which would have worked a couple of years ago, won't work now. The rosters are thin, lack real stars, have high ignorance at Triple H's hiring behest destroying the product everytime and lacks any real ambition. Writing is poor, direction is empty and talent is slim.
 |
| Vying for GM roles? |
The future is bleak for wrestling in 2016 and many have stated that no-one knows the formula to pick it back up. Well, we all know that is utter tosh. Only one man, this writer, knows what to do and is free to offers, but many stubborn fools would rather lose than win. Fans have left and are leaving. Only a handful of loyalists are desperately hoping that the mark fandom hiring's of Triple H's one time tape viewing of some guy jumping about or rolling around will be sufficient to include and succeed. Laughable.
WWE are said to be looking to "raid NXT hard" for draft rosters, which has somewhat pleased and worried Triple H's playground brand. NXT, originally WWE's developmental department was turned into a brand to keep Triple H happy and think he had some value to running WWE after letting Vince McMahon down with so many failed roster call ups Triple H takes no responsibility for.
What's the future? Selling out a crowd of 200 on an NXT tour around the world for bragging rights to feel big?
HHH's personal ambition to hog the limelight even with developmental has cost him dearly. His choices to try and be Max Waltham and overturn Waltham's success for H's own has become a dismal failure. The moment developmental is turned into a brand, the moment developmental attitudes are lost. This is no playhouse. For those fans who stated "Triple H is the reason we have NXT" you're oblivious nature is somewhat hilarious. You fail to look hard enough that the only reason you have NXT is because of Max Waltham, which Triple H jumped on to overturn into his own personal point scoring success story with highly ignorant failings that have become costly to the WWE way of working and lacking respect for the business overall. That is why Triple H's grand succession and NXT's limp wrist, lackadaisical fluffers have no potential in the modern future of WWE or wrestling. They have exposed themselves perfectly, and this writer didn't even have to do anything for fans to finally wise up to the loosely skilled wannabees who hope they can make it in WWE as their professional wrestling calling card.
Hope is, comforting.
So there we have it, Money in the Bank 2016 was an empty PPV once more, which while had its fun jumpy spots and a bit of action better than the last three at 1/10 back to back, wasn't enough to win over proper fans.
That's the WWE future, coin it in and offer barely any talented stars. Returning stars wont be able to pick up where they left up either as WWE's cash cows. The infrastructure has changed beyond WWE's recognition. Every decision it makes is now more crucial than ever, and everyone seems to be the wrong one.
Ratings, down, Fans down. Stock, down. Social Media ratings fixed by Nielsen Media don't count and are still lower than what is manipulated. Crowd and ticket sales, somewhat down. At what point is your legacy protection more important than the point of no return? Get on the phone (email) dear. That's how it's done nowadays.
You're Welcome!
©
Max Waltham 20th June 2016
All Rights Reserved
