Rockin' the Royal Rumble
a decade later!
WWE presented their twenty-sixth edition of the Royal Rumble extravaganza live on Sunday January 27th from the US Airways Center in Phoenix, Arizona. With The Rock firmly in place from many months ago for tonight's main event, will he leave with the most coveted prize in sports entertainment he returned for? In addition to this, would WWE be able to produce a great card with its other superstars and set up any strong lines to a future with the chance to create a new superstar of the back of the very Royal Rumble match itself? Let's delve a little deeper...
World Heavyweight Championship
Last Man Standing
Alberto Del Rio (c) w/ Ricardo Rodriguez Vs Big Show
As Rio makes his entrance to the ring through the corridor
backstage, with Ricardo taking his time and Rio stressing they are on and need
to move it, Bret “The Hitman” Hart talks to them beforehand expressing how much
Rio reminds him of a Mexican Bret Hart. Hart also places the pink shades over
an excited Rodriguez.
Big Show starts by taking Rio to the corner with headbutts
and fists. Show knocks into Rio to knock him down. It was a basic Big Show
match with bog standard practice once again. Knock, fall, wait. A Last Man
Standing match was a perfect place for WWE to mask Big Show’s inaccuracies. He
can remain down on the mat whilst gaining time to figure out his next match
spots whilst resting due to his incapabilities in the ring with minimal action.
Del Rio returned fire with some further impressive flight,
including a hurricanrana as a huge selling point to this match. Landing a
seated senton on Show, then aims to follow up with the cross armbreaker however
Show counters into a slam of sorts. Rio returns to his feet after a minor
count. Show delivers chops and brings in a steel chair for extra punch. “Ce”
rings out fro the WWE Universe in an intense display showing just how over Rio
is when combatting Show with the chair. Rio soon takes a chokeslam and makes it
to his feet. Rio works Show down with a kick to his goolies, which saW Show
pause in the ring for so long in a disgraceful manner that he almost forgot
where he was in an attempt to convey the pain and took ages to sink like a
stone which was just dire. Rio gave a boot to the head for extra measure on
kneeling Show to take down. Show soon rose up again after a lengthy nine count.
Both manage to trek backwards to the arena entrance stage
where both alarmingly climb the scaffolding structures above. Show wrenches a
chokeslam on once more and hurls Rio off plummeting into a table below, randomly
in place for extra measure. Rio was down but prevailed at a nine count.
The two soon travelled back to the ring outside, where
Ricardo attacked Show from behind. Show responded by tossing Rodriguez into the
barricade. The most obvious charge was coming. Rio, by the corner barricade,
waited for Show to launch a running spear, as Rio swiftly moved and sent the
powerful block that was Big Show obviously through the barricade which broke in
another traditional booking ideal for Show’s, uhm, structure. Show managed to
make it to his feet once again.
Rio smacked Show’s back with chair shots in the ring, then
locked on the armbar submission to slow down the giant. On the outside, Ricardo
Rodriguez scurried to the bottom rope where Show’s feet were level, and pulled
out and tied the ever deadly duct tape around Show’s feet. Fans were furious!
Shades of John Cena/Batista at Over the Limit drove them nuts. WWE booked
another duct tape tie feet down ending causing Big Show to fail to stand up
before a count of ten claiming Alberto Del Rio as the winner in a tedious,
disgraceful and destructive way for Rio to win on a technicality that does not portray match excellence nor even rules of the Last Man Standing requirement. WWE don’t
realise they ruin the star they try to make just as much as the one who loses
they try to protect.
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| Har Har CM Punk, Bertie's got Balloons... |
The three stooges AJ, Dolph Ziggler and Big E. 'background
character' Langston were interviewed by Matt Striker. Ziggs said that his ex-girlfriend
and Managing Supervisor of Raw, Vickie Guerrero was “Bitter, jaded and pathetic.” Ziggler’s
new girlfriend spoke for him adding “Dolph can’t do it? My Ziggy isn’t good
enough?” Dolph ended he planned to cash in at Wrestlemania so he can “unify”
the World and WWE titles. Yeah, good luck with that. It is also encouraging to
see AJ adopt “Ziggy.” Previous endorsements include “Ziggs” “Zigglesworth” “babe”
and many others from Wrestling Wonders. You’re Welcome!
He ended “Show……………..
OFF!”
WWE Tag Team Championship
Kane and Daniel Bryan (c) Vs Cody Rhodes and Damien Sandow
Bryan and Rhodes set the tone for the beginning with equal
trading of blows as Bryan locks a Mexican Surfboard on Rhodes, after which tags
Kane in. Kane gains a quick two fall, before controlling. Rhodes soon switches
and dropkicks Big Red. Sandow enters to double team though depleted by Kane.
Bryan and Rhodes re-enter for some technical tussling for a while in a credible
display until Sandow regains a tag with a side Russian Leg Sweep to allow a
drop of the Elbow of Disdain for a two count on Bryan. Cody returned to work a double
team well, further highlighting the tight connection in Rhodes Scholars. Cody
later adds on a submissive hold on Bryan well.
After Kane returns to head to the turnbuckle, Sandow
retaliates as the pair duke it out with Kane getting the better of him and
knocking Damien down. Kane tumbles down as Sandow moves to land a swinging
neckbreaker beautifully on Kane with swift transition for a two fall. Rhodes
enters to halt a double clothesline, only to both double team Kane with his
manoeuver failing to notice Bryan blind tag in just before Kane fell victim to
the duo. Bryan flies a missile dropkick into Sandow, while Kane somehow returns
to chokeslam Cody. Daniel Bryan slams on the YES! Lock forcing Sandow to delay
the inevitable and tap out and secure the tag team championships for Team Hell
No in a tremendous display.
The Rumble match looms. It’s not going on last, naturally.
30 Man Royal Rumble
Dolph Ziggler, Chris Jericho, Cody Rhodes, Kofi Kingston,
Santino Marella, Drew McIntyre, Titus O’Neil, Goldust, David Otunga, Heath
Slater, Sheamus, Tensai, Brodus Clay, Rey Mysterio, Darren Young, Bo Dallas,
The Godfather, Wade Barrett, John Cena, Damien Sandow, Daniel Bryan, Antonio
Cesaro, The Great Khali, Kane, Randy Orton, Jinder Mahal, The Miz, Sin Cara,
Ryback
Kicking off the Rumble encounter
itself, Justin Roberts (No Howard Finkel!?) informs the rules. Every 90
seconds, that’s a minute and a half, a new superstar will enter the match.
The first two take their places.
Number 1 was Dolph Ziggler. Number 2? Usually the first two are for big stars
to get the show going, and sometimes a shock return. Many though it would be
John Cena. It was a returning Chris Jericho! What a shocker. The crowd were
wild for this one. They chanted “You still got it” in a nonsensical, do what is
always the standard as they don’t know anything else to say. Jericho barely
began wrestling before this chant was mentioned and Jericho had also returned
last year proving he ‘had it’ with his in ring performances.
No. 3 strode out after his
previous match. It was Cody Rhodes. Jericho superplexed Ziggler while Rhodes
came along. Y2J instantly clotheslines Cody. Ziggs and Rhodes soon double team
Jericho, now down in the corner as most standard Rumble booking adopts. Y2J
later clasps on a Walls of Jericho on Cody, broken by Ziggler. Kofi Kingston then
enters as the number 4 entry. After some high spots and attempting to ditch
Dolph, Cody plans on taking both out. No. 5 returned from injury to surprise
everyone. Santino Marella joined the festivities. Marella goes for Rhodes and
Jericho together, now combating. Somehow, ‘Tino has the ring all to himself,
centre, to pull out the Cobra, nailing Kingston.
Chris and Cody then eliminate Marella. He was first out. Ziggler and Rhodes join forces once more to remove Kofi, who valiantly defends his position. Man number 6 is ‘the chosen one’ Drew McIntyre. Jericho almost gets eliminated but holds on, time enough for number 7 to enter as Titus O’Neil. O’Neil still hasn’t learned how to work in the ring and relies on muscle mass to carry him. He had terrible exchanges with Rhodes and Kofi with a double clothesline takedown. O’Neil hurls Kofi over the ring in a pointless display that did not create any levels of being a ‘beast.’ Titus tried to eliminate both Ziggler and Jericho, in the same two for one spot again.
Chris and Cody then eliminate Marella. He was first out. Ziggler and Rhodes join forces once more to remove Kofi, who valiantly defends his position. Man number 6 is ‘the chosen one’ Drew McIntyre. Jericho almost gets eliminated but holds on, time enough for number 7 to enter as Titus O’Neil. O’Neil still hasn’t learned how to work in the ring and relies on muscle mass to carry him. He had terrible exchanges with Rhodes and Kofi with a double clothesline takedown. O’Neil hurls Kofi over the ring in a pointless display that did not create any levels of being a ‘beast.’ Titus tried to eliminate both Ziggler and Jericho, in the same two for one spot again.
Number 8 became the second
surprise entry. Goldust. The formerly fired for terrible output on Smackdown while in charge and PR
disaster on Twitter preaching to and blocking fans for disagreeing with his
Christian beliefs returned. Cody waited for Goldie to approach. Both had a
brawl of minor proportions, before Goldust downed Ziggler. Rhodes supports bro
Goldie but soon gets dusted off with a right hand instead. Cody is almost
eliminated by his brother, but holds on. Goldie received a few crowd responses.
Ever favourite and useless bulk
David Otunga became number 9. He became a distant memory instantly. Heath
Slater joins as #10. Sheamus follows as 11. Shea launches Otunga into O’Neil,
knocking Titus out of the ring. Otunga clambers to safety on from his near
loss, only for Sheamus to slam a Brogue Kick to eliminate him.
Tensai joined at number 12.
“Albert” rang through the crowd once more. All the same chants. The audience became
more mindless than the WWE product. Tensai nails headbutts on the Celtic Warrior.
At 13 the funk is on, as Brodus Clay joins the frucous. He drops Jericho before
squaring off with equal frame Tensai. Rhodes and Goldust return to centre focal
point, taunting by Rhodes and smacking Goldust in the gut. After some on apron
tight tussling, Rhodes sends dust into the post and eliminates him. Yes. I know
what you’re thinking. This sounds so repetitive and exhausting.
Number 14 was a returning Rey
Mysterio. Hitting Ziggler and the Jericho with a 619 and frog splash, Cody
almost sends Rey out, just in time for number 15. Prime Time Junkie Darren
Young. In a blind and unseen how it happened uprising; Brodus Clay was against
the ropes as everyone swiftly united to tip the funky dino out of the ring. Ludicrous.
What happened next was plain ridiculous.
Obvious was the notion that springy Kofi Kingston would have the ‘stupid spot’
once again. Previous years with John Morrison and last year’s Kofi ‘thrown over
the top rope but not touching the ground to re-enter the Rumble’ farce
continued. Ziggler hurled Kingston out, who lands on the back of Tensai, whom
Kofi just eliminated. Using Tensai to land onto the Spanish Announce Table, SAP
Kofi Kingston avoided elimination and contemplated a launch from table to the
ring. Instead, Kofi grabbed a swivel chair, stood upon it, and hopped along on
the chiar to get to the ring for re-entry. It was absolutely pathetic. Cody
Rhodes then eliminated Darren Young and threw a disaster kick into Kofi to
eliminate him seconds later.
At 16, Bo Dallas entered the Rumble. Dallas
had previously won an NXT contest with seven other men one day earlier to gain
a place in the match. Alex Riley and Michael McGuillicutty didn’t feature.
No. 17 came in the form of, The
Godfather! With his Hoeski’s alongside, Goddy entered the ring for literally a
second before Ziggler eliminated him. The announce team acknowledged this
surprise entry as “one of the shortest” to which WWE seem to have a fascination
with short record scorings. It was a complete waste of a character and a spot,
not that WWE care for its viewing audience. Godfather lives in the area, and is
always a shoe in for the match when Raw
Roulette is scheduled for the following evening. Wade Barrett enters next at 18
to no interest or dominance.
No. 19 was John Cena. Everyone looked
at Cena as a potential threat. Yes. When Cena is present, everyone must drop
everything and focus on WWE’s premier superstar. Jobbers unite as Barrett,
Ziggler and Slater join to attack a rushing Cena, who fights every one of them
off with ease. Cena instantly eliminated Heath Slater and Cody Rhodes. Jericho
took on Cena after the impending superhero charge of doom. Jericho was almost
sent out until Dolph Ziggler (?) saved Y2J, his nemesis, for an even greater
pain in Cena. Cena even went for the
rookie Dallas after, who fought Johnnie Boy off. No. 20 arrived attempting to
save us all. Damien Sandow. He goes for Dallas with a knockdown. Out of
nowhere, Wade Barrett catches Rey Mysterio then slams a boot into Mysterio to
eliminate him for the Rumble. Sheamus hits Wade while Jericho counters an
Attitude Adjustment from Cena. Bryan flings high kicks to Barrett. Bryan almost
sends Jericho out, as Sheamus helps.
Antonio Cesaro entered at 21. Cesaro
gave an impressive uppercut to Dallas before going for Y2J in the corner. The
Great Khali joins at 22. Barrett, Sandow and Dallas receive disgraceful chops.
Cesaro is still trying to eliminate Sheamus, who moved onto him after Jericho.
Confusing, right?
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| Thanks for coming. |
Kane came at 23. He took on
Jericho, Ziggler and Khali. Sheamus and Sandow are now going at it. Eh? Where’s
Cesaro? Wasn’t he with Sheamus? Kane then dropped a headbutt on Antonio Cesaro.
Oh, there he is. Zack Ryder then enters at 24. There was no impact. The
unthinkable then occurred. Daniel Bryan eliminated Kane in a chance
opportunity! Kane was livid. Cesaro then bumped Bryan over the rope to the
outside though landed onto Kane in a bearhug clutch. Bryan’s feet did not touch
the ground. Bryan yelled “No!” as Kane retorted “YES!” to encourage audience
participation. They blindly joined in. The chants are starting to peter-out. Kane’s visible hilarity at the chants while holding
Bryan face to face were too much not to laugh to himself which was highly
humourous. He couldn’t contain as much as he tried. It was more humourous to see,
so this actually pleased than annoyed. So, is Kane gonna drop him or what?
Kane was a good sport; he placed
Bryan back to the apron. Bryan was thankful with a sigh of relief at Kane’s
glaring eyes. Until, The Big Red Monster pulled the rug from under Bryan, still
locked with his legs and swiped him onto the floor. Daniel Bryan was eliminated
for his betrayal.
Randy Orton joined next at number
25. The crowd gave a huge reaction to WWE’s hottest hunk. He ploughed through
Barrett, Sheamus and Ziggler following up on Ryder and Dallas. Orton slams a
devastating RKO on Ryder, then eliminating him from the match. Cesaro and
Barrett work together aiming to silence Rand, just in time for number 27,
Jinder Mahal. It was a wasted spot of non-importance.
John Cena somehow instantly
eliminates Antonio Cesaro with ease in a pointless decision.
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| Sterling workers for WWE's future |
Jinder Mahal is eliminated
somehow. No fuller details were shown.
Anti-climax Sin Cara returned as
number 29 in the biggest disinterest from the audience, who were expecting
bigger things from number 29. Cara returned from injury.
There is only one person left,
and everyone knows who it is. Sheamus almost sent out Cara instantly.
A shock elimination occurs as
Wade Barrett is eliminated by Bo Dallas. Bitter bore Barrett waited for Dallas
to return nearer the ropes to smash a bullhammer elbow on him causing elimination
from the outside. These eliminations are terribly acted and ruin the feel of
the Rumble, but, the principal is that Dallas was in the match and then out,
and those are the ‘rules.’ These should be booked minimally, but WWE constantly
book them which causes problems with its over reliance of repetition and
audience segmentation.
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| It's not working. |
Chris Jericho attempts to take
down the hero of the ring. He lands a Codebreaker. Powerful Ryback fell to that
move from veteran Y2J. Jericho now lands a Lionsault on John Cena who has
resurfaced somewhere. Jeri dropkicks Sheamus but manages to avoid leaving the
match. Y2J clotheslines Randy and delivers a Codebreaker to Ziggles. Ziggy then
superkick’s Jericho in retaliation. Hmmm. Oh, this move eliminates Chris
Jericho, by the way.
We now have a final five. Not the
traditional four. Sheamus, Cena, Orton, Ziggler and Ryback remain. Ooh, tense.
Orton drops clotheslines and destroys everyone with RKO’s in succession. Orton
goes for a DDT second rope smash on Ryback, stuck in-between the middle and top
ropes somehow. Tangled up, Ryback, the grand monster of supreme domination clotheslines
Randy out of the Rumble. Yes. Randy Orton is out of there. Fans were peeved a
meathead no-name dropped Orton.
Carnage continued as bodies flew
all over the place in a mish mash of whatever it was. Ziggler hangs on to the
ropes after finding himself near the floor. Sheamus rushed a Brogue Kick into
Ziggler to eliminate the blonde blunder.
Cena and Sheamus join to double
suplex Ryback. Both then look up to the Mania sign before the signal to battle
one another. It’s a typical Cena flurry of missing, non-impactful punches
routine until going for a five knuckle shuffle halted by Ryback with a clubbing
clothesline. Oh gawd. The clothesline is returning in the over repetitive
writing context.
Sheamus counters Ryback’s Shellshock
backbreaker with a White Noise backbreaker. The Great White goes for another
Brogue Kick, which fails dismally, as the great powerhouse superstar that is
Ryback scoops Sheamus up and drops him over the top rope to eliminate him. It
was that easy.
So its John Cena verses Ryback.
Cena begins brawling. Ryback lands a spinebuster. Cena then captures Ryback
into the STF. There was no pressure on the hold again and the over animation of
teeth gritting orgasm was dire. The big powerhouse monstrosity that is Ryback
passed out to John Cena. Cena rolled him over to lift him up and sits Ry-b atop
the rope turnbuckle. The beast that is Ryback awakes from his slumber and
launches a Lou Thesz press on Cena. He slams Cena’s head into the mat before
scooping Cena up. Cena slips out from underneath Ryback and simply shoves him
over the top rope. John Cena has won the Royal Rumble. Thrilling.
See bottom for elimination order list.
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| John Cena wins. |
WWE Championship
The Rock Vs CM Punk (c) w/ Paul Heyman
The pair instantly brawl to begin
the match after their intense promos previously shared in the build up on Raw.
Rock attacks. Punk outside.
Heyman hovers. Strong Rock presence and charge for Punk. Dismantles SAP table as
predicted. Punk puts lid back on as notion of respect. Rock attacked with boot gut by Punk. Heyman creeps up behind with a club to Rock's back. Punk clotheslines. Punk tends to the SAP table again. He puts the lid back on and laughes. Punk has some difficulty
lifting Rock. Snapmare and a boot to the back of Rock. Rocky has an electric crowd in attendance. They
came for him. Punk clasps around with body scissors. Heyman staring poignantly. Tension bubbles perfectly.
Punk lands a heel kick to Rock’s
face after an inverted atomic drop. Punk maintains control of the match working
The Rock’s torso over. Heyman takes a second swipe behind the official's back of
the Brahma Bull. Un-allowing a second assault from shady Heyman, Rock hunts
down Heyman with his piercing red eye. Infuriated, the Bull forces Heyman
backward in the corner outside unaware of Punk attacking from behind in a
pincer attack to remain on top, knocking Rock to the ground.
Rock leads a good proportion of
the match wearing down Punk’s tender knee pain as Punk turns the tables
throwing to the outside and launching himself with a torpedo dive at Rock. Rock
later changes the pace and attempts the Rock Bottom, though countered by Punk
elbows into a GTS though Rock too swift for that retaliates by catching his
exposed leg and clasps the Sharpshooter on Punk who switches into the
Anaconda Vice in a tense, rapid exchange of near attacks.
Rocky avoids a near loss dropping
the DDT as Heyman watches on. Rock responds for another Bottom to which Punk counters, where Rock now firmly sticks CM into the Sharpshooter. Punk escapes to
the outside as Rock gives chase decking with a clothesline and begins
dismantling the SAP table. Rock ferociously punches Punk as he smashes Rock’s
head with a leg shot. Positioning Rock atop the table, a GTS follows to no
avail. Rock plans the Bottom once more however the table collapses underneath
them both.
A while later they get back into it in ring. The Rock finally attempts a crucial People’s Elbow. All of a sudden the lights blackout! Oh my god, is it Chris Jericho? Undertaker? We don’t know. The lights are down for a while as scrambling is seen in the dark with sound of attack. Michael Cole screams in the darkness about The Shield. The lights return to show an incapacitated Rock sprawled out in the middle of the announce table collapsed on the floor as Punk is down in the ring. Convenient time for the lights to get fixed. Punk has a little smile, laugh and implores he has no idea what has just happened. He was in the ring at the time, down, of course. How could he know?
Punk manages to heave Rock into the ring, finish him off and cover for a three fall. CM Punk just defeated The Rock and remains WWE Champion.
A while later they get back into it in ring. The Rock finally attempts a crucial People’s Elbow. All of a sudden the lights blackout! Oh my god, is it Chris Jericho? Undertaker? We don’t know. The lights are down for a while as scrambling is seen in the dark with sound of attack. Michael Cole screams in the darkness about The Shield. The lights return to show an incapacitated Rock sprawled out in the middle of the announce table collapsed on the floor as Punk is down in the ring. Convenient time for the lights to get fixed. Punk has a little smile, laugh and implores he has no idea what has just happened. He was in the ring at the time, down, of course. How could he know?
Punk manages to heave Rock into the ring, finish him off and cover for a three fall. CM Punk just defeated The Rock and remains WWE Champion.
As Punk widely celebrates his
triumph, the Chairman of WWE beams out to greet the champ. Reminding Punk that
if The Shield made a presence in the match in one way or another, Mr.McMahon
would personally strip CM Punk of the WWE title. Heyman pleads on all fours not
to follow through as McMahon intends to strip Punk. Punk’s saving grace, his
former foe, The Rock, catching his breath from outside in a slump by the
barricade, “No No No No No…” adding if anyone would take that title from Punk,
it would be Rock and Rock alone. Requesting McMahon restart the match, the Chairman
complied. The match is restarted.
WWE Championship
The Rock Vs CM Punk (c) w/ Paul Heyman
Punk scrambles over returning
Rock with a flurry of hits. The crowd are fired highly. Punk scores a knee to
the head falling The Rock again. To finally end his opponent's chances in style,
Punk scales to the top turnbuckle and lands the flying elbow drop. Rock managed
to kick out at a very tense two fall. Punk goes for the GTS as Rock slides out
of the hold to return a spinebuster on the defending champion. The Rock issues
one last try with The People’s Elbow following with a cover on CM Punk to gain
a three fall and win the WWE championship in an outstanding match between the
two.
WWE billed its Royal Rumble PPV
around The Rock which was a wise decision to gather interest early on. Choosing
to put Punk in the spotlight was also a valid choice. Despite instant belief
Rock would outright win was suspended beautifully by the series keeping both
lines of competition available meaning Punk could have been a promising
challenge to Rocky. As every match should, both rivals should have supporters
in each side to add extreme weight to any contest and only Punk and Rock
achieved this milestone since nearly a decade of wrestling in WWE. Nothing came
close. Punk simply doesn’t have the competition, which is also the company’s
problem. It has lined out only one champion at a time and only one constant for
money making principals that the ten years timeframe has suffered and numerous
revenue could have been made more than off the back of one star overall.
Alberto Del Rio’s turn to the
good side was an obvious matter of time and has become an invigorating way
forward for him, WWE and the audience. Upholding the title match. Rio also
encouraged Big Show to work a little better than others he has previously
battled. Show is still vastly ignorant in the ring and it is not helping, so
the drawing board must be approached. Everyone needs to think about the
direction Show can feasibly have and what he can do to get this across. That
will restore him to an extent and add audience interest. His role in title
pictures, however, must be resigned. Rio made exceptional work and held the
show, pardon the pun, together handsomely. Most would have struggled. This
proved another one of WWE’s key talents revealed when it finally decides to put
forward new prospects. It should not unify titles when talent is so low and
needed on both brands, either. That is a pointless decision that benefits no
one. Once it is done, it is hard to come back from. It will not work based on
stubborn pushing forward of ideas.
Oh, and WWE should have stuck Aksana in there this year to help her beau. Of all the females, she was most feasible to go in. If WWE can finally raise Natalya up instead of bogging her down, then she could make massive impact next year, but WWE aren't, uhm, 'big' on her.
Man/Woman of the PPV – The Rock
Men/Women of their matches – Alberto
Del Rio, Cody Rhodes, Cody Rhodes, The Rock
PPV Rating - 4/10
WWE billed its Royal Rumble PPV
around The Rock which was a wise decision to gather interest early on. Choosing
to put Punk in the spotlight was also a valid choice. Despite instant belief
Rock would outright win was suspended beautifully by the series keeping both
lines of competition available meaning Punk could have been a promising
challenge to Rocky. As every match should, both rivals should have supporters
in each side to add extreme weight to any contest and only Punk and Rock
achieved this milestone since nearly a decade of wrestling in WWE. Nothing came
close. Punk simply doesn’t have the competition, which is also the company’s
problem. It has lined out only one champion at a time and only one constant for
money making principals that the ten years timeframe has suffered and numerous
revenue could have been made more than off the back of one star overall.
The Royal Rumble match could not
go on last because of a) its result and b) Rock’s return and the restart plan
to drive home protecting both champions of this generation to its audience. The
Rumble was a chance for those not winning the match to at least impress and WWE
made it so standard once again that it was difficult for anyone to do so. They
could not show their main potential they could have for future matches. Perhaps WWE felt they needed
to neuter them not to conflict with the main event. This is one theory but not
in place. WWE just book the match the same way, everytime, rendering it a
tedious joke when this phenomenon used to be the best match for thousands of
modern WWE fans. They expect something special and the standard of today is to
line up a Mania match between a comfortable superstar than a new rising star
with great opportunity to provide a future and add huge growth to a star. This
is usually the general purpose of the match itself and if is being forgotten
then WWE should consider revising its formula. Either scrap it or re-book it
the correct way in principality.
Those who did however standout were
Bo Dallas as the surprise to many, Cody Rhodes who is still mistreated and Antonio
Cesaro. The rest were surplus bodies in a numbers game.
WWE should have placed in Brad
Maddox and even considered a victory. It could also have regenerated Michael
McGuillicutty or Alex Riley also if placed in and donated time effectively.
Those who don’t win have opportunities to create an opening of rebuilding esteem,
often ignored again.
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| Image Credit: WWE |
McMahon thought a win-win
situation by putting Cena, the youthful favourite against Ryback, the John Cena
clone that fans who oppose Cena and also oppose Ryback would have ‘no choice’
than to cheer Ryback. How flawed that perception was. Both were turnoffs to
viewers and remain so and the fans, though are easily led into manipulation
from WWE, weren't that easy to control with Sheamus nor Ryback formulas. It was a
throwaway opportunity.
Don’t blame Cena. He’s been
‘good’ all year. He hasn’t loitered around or been involved in the WWE title
picture for over a year. You know, that’s a record for the WWE cherub to take a
back seat from clogging up the product with the title.
Royal Rumble was highly disjointed
and could have been exceptional if WWE figured out how to do so, but are stuck
in their ways and haven’t understood how to create a new formula that only
certain people can muster. They need to get those people to work with them than
against them in order to protract quality and prestige it claims it aims to
project than just booking the ‘big one’ for 'Mania, yet again. Once in a
lifetime has now become twice in a lifetime, soon to be third in a lifetime at,
wait for it, Wrestlemania 30! All to set up one match. Fans feel cheated of last years 'one time' and this year's Rumble opportunities available to freshen the product.
The tag team championship was a
decent effort from all four men and could be in line for a more healthy
outlook. The problem is that when these four are not involved or changing
sparring partners, WWE’s teams are filled with terrible disgraces and
inconsistencies that instantly undo all that is done. WWE need to cut the weak
from the chaff. The Prime Time Players add nothing and must go. They are borderline
racist, cannot work and are not actually doing anything good in the ring as
personalities. Dead wood must be cleared. Team the loitering newbies and NXT’ers
on the roster. You have never needed them more. Bryan and Kane has its shelf
life, though was necessary to win tonight.
Alberto Del Rio’s turn to the
good side was an obvious matter of time and has become an invigorating way
forward for him, WWE and the audience. Upholding the title match. Rio also
encouraged Big Show to work a little better than others he has previously
battled. Show is still vastly ignorant in the ring and it is not helping, so
the drawing board must be approached. Everyone needs to think about the
direction Show can feasibly have and what he can do to get this across. That
will restore him to an extent and add audience interest. His role in title
pictures, however, must be resigned. Rio made exceptional work and held the
show, pardon the pun, together handsomely. Most would have struggled. This
proved another one of WWE’s key talents revealed when it finally decides to put
forward new prospects. It should not unify titles when talent is so low and
needed on both brands, either. That is a pointless decision that benefits no
one. Once it is done, it is hard to come back from. It will not work based on
stubborn pushing forward of ideas.
The 1970s approach to star making
is not the era that is in ever changing audiences in 2013. He who adopts this
way of lifestyle must understand those Hulk Hogan archetype action figures are
not the ones that drive the future anymore. Yes, some must be brand identity
aspects, but when it comes to the overall brand of what WWE stands for, it
needs to prioritise the most vital parts in order to maintain its value.
No divas? Kaitlyn was scheduled
at the last minute to battle Tamina for the title as champion after Eve left
and Kaitlyn won in her hometown on Raw two weeks ago. Allowing its own division to collapse and do
nothing to resurrect it is just abhorrent disgrace from WWE, highlighting that
it has no idea on making future aspects anymore and only seen as chasing
mainstream headlines and money making ‘big’ match ventures at ‘the big one’ in
three months. She may be terrible, but months ago we 'told' you Kaitlyn would be champ soon. Oh come on, it's fun "weeeeeeeeeeee!"
WWE are planning Layla to turn heel on Kaitlyn as we speak. There are no other options in line.
Based on returns alone and entering everyone
on the card in double duty was its forthright. Stars in matches should not be
entered into the Rumble itself, or have we forgotten brand identity once again
just as the supershow and title show swapping lunacy? So who of the entries would have benefited from the win? Antonio Cesaro, Randy Orton or The Miz and yet all of those names are not of 'importance' to make the top. Cesaro is not to be rushed yet but could theoretically challenge and lose at 'Mania to build profile. Miz is in desperate need and winning yje Rumble could revamp him but his stock has sunk. Orton is the only option but didn't need it, therefore WWE should have selected entries more crucially.
Oh, and WWE should have stuck Aksana in there this year to help her beau. Of all the females, she was most feasible to go in. If WWE can finally raise Natalya up instead of bogging her down, then she could make massive impact next year, but WWE aren't, uhm, 'big' on her.
What happens when the big money
makers, for whatever reason, are all gone? When you haven’t made anyone else?
There is nothing left. The end result is to pack up and go home. Most of the
WWE Universe have clearly sent this message to WWE over the last year, included
with its viewing decline. It’s time to wake up, realise, leave the ego at the
door and place those stepping stones, or simply resign your grand vision to
dust. Nothing is eternal, but allowing it to fall without any attempt at
protection is catastrophic.
Order of Elimination list below.
1) Santino Marella (by Cody Rhodes)
2) Drew McIntytre (by Chris Jericho)
3) Titus O’Niel (by Sheamus)
4) David Otunga (by Sheamus)
5) Goldust (by Cody Rhodes)
6) Brodus Clay (by multiple people)
7) Tensai (by Kofi Kingston amid others)
8) Darren Young (by Kofi Kingston)
9) Kofi Kingston (by Cody Rhodes)
10) The Godfather (by Dolph Ziggler)
11) Heath Slater (by John Cena)
12) Cody Rhodes (by John Cena)
13) Rey Mysterio (by Wade Barrett)
14) The Great Khali (by Kane)
15) Kane (by Daniel Bryan)
16) Daniel Bryan (by Kane)
17) Zack Ryder (by Randy Orton)
18) Antonio Cesaro (by John Cena)
19) Jinder Mahal (by Sheamus)
20) Wade Barrett (by Bo Dallas)
21) Bo Dallas (by Wade Barrett)
22) Damien Sandow (by Ryback)
23) Sin Cara (by Ryback)
24) The Miz (by Ryback)
25) Chris Jericho (by Dolph Ziggler)
26) Randy Orton (by Ryback)
27) Dolph Ziggler (by Sheamus)
28) Sheamus (by Ryback)
29) Ryback (by John Cena)
© Max Waltham 30th January 2013
All Rights Reserved
